Saturday 23 June 2012

VIVE LA DIFFERENCE



It looks like we have signed over the lease on the townhouse we have been renting and can move back to our apartment during the week in Auckland. The potential new tenants are a nice gay couple. Women. Lesbians. Is the use of the word lesbians PC? I don't know. All I know is that they are educated, have good jobs and love each other. Good for them. Good for us too if it all goes through as we can relinquish the fixed term lease that we are committed to.

Lesbians. I wonder if the word and implications still send shivers through the psyches of NZ males? On one level there is the sexist frisson often heard in bars where the alpha males think that they can 're-educate' the lesbians by giving them a good rogering. On another is the older type of Kiwi (not always defined by age) who are scared shitless about the fact that women can prefer women.

I remember, years ago at Allied Liquor Merchants one of the senior accounts women, M. was a lesbian. This is the liquor industry in New Zealand in the 1980's so it was still dominated by males in all senior positions and most of the middle management positions with a smattering of women in sales and virtually all women in clerical positions. Some of the macho dickhead sales people would make scathing comments about M. ( behind her back). Friday night drinks were de rigeur back then and often people would bring their wives, husbands, girlfriends or boyfriends in for a drink before heading off elsewhere. One evening M. told me that she was going to bring her partner in for a drink. When she did, and introduced the woman as her lover to some of the old crusties you could almost hear the intake of breath around the room. As a consequence M. and her lover were left alone at a table feeling the sharp glances of all the blokes around. I left the group that I was talking with and went and sat with them and had a delightful conversation for half an hour before I had to go.

A couple of years earlier, when I was managing a large and trendy inner city wine and spirit merchants a 'woman's group' was organising a celebratory function and we were providing the drinks and hire items. As it was a very large do and subsequent order I was assisting in the arrangements. One of the young women was beautiful with an almost translucent glow to her that made me think of the women in the paintings by the pre-Raphaelites.


We spent time together planning the wines and requirements and there was some sort of palpable connection between us.
One of the other women, it subsequently seemed to be her other half, noticed and took every opportunity to muscle in between us.


I don't think she liked me and the only connection I felt with her was the sharp jabs of her elbows into my ribs from time to time.

After helping the loading of the van with the party goods my last memory was seeing my Ophelia looking back at me from the passenger window as the group drove off.


3 comments:

Richard (of RBB) said...

You've left us a bit up in the air here - a bit like the final episode, for the season, for a TV show.
Did the cute lesbian fancy Comeinyourpants or did she go with the manly built woman?
I really don't care less, these days, who bonks who... man on aligator, that's okay with me.
Well, as long as it's okay with the aligator.
Comeinyourpants, you're an attractive man in your own way (but, sadly(?), not attractive to me) but I don't believe you have the skills to turn a pretty lesbian. Sorry to be the bearer of this news.
There again, though, the guys at the Americana Jam at Meow don't want me playing in their concert.

THE CURMUDGEON said...

Hey, in 1984 I was slim, curly and lovely. Why wouldn't she fancy me? I had also learnt by then (belatedly) that women like caring and sensitive guys.

No, Ophelia and I never got together but we've all gone through those 'what if' moments and opportunities. That same year I hooked up with anothe M. with whom I had a 3 year relationship until the love of my life came on the scene and life has never been better.

Valley Girl said...

Don't talk to me about lesbians. I had to do jury service last year and the trial I was on the jury for invovled a domestic assault between an elderly lesbian couple. Very nasty. Very dramatic and a great waste of taxpayer money. They had a messy break up too. A very interesting introduction to the workings of the court room and jury. Girls can be so nasty!