Saturday 7 September 2013

SWEDISH LANGUAGE LESSON #1

IKEA Swedish word that has multiple meanings and interpretations. Principal translation is crap. Popular interpretation is cheap. General meaning and synonyms are: frustrating, annoying, impossible-to-assemble and shoddy.
Well, we made our first ( and last) purchases at Ikea. Having to furnish an apartment and knowing that we will only be here short term, we decided to use Ikea for some of the simpler items (TV stand, bedside tables, chest of drawers). We were gobsmacked when we visited the massive Ikea store. The selection was great and the prices even more so. The problem is though (and we should have known, "you only ever get what you pay for"}.




Assembling the items in the condominium several things were soon apparent:
  • The instructions were obtuse, confusing and generally lacking
  • The screws, nails and assembly items were small and next to useless
  • The quality of the 'timber' is crap.
It is virtually impossible to assemble this stuff without bending, breaking or otherwise disfiguring it. It is so flimsy.


I'm glad that the Old Girl spent proper money on the lounge suite, bed, and bed-settee at a regular furniture place.

9 comments:

Richard (of RBB) said...

Welcome back Nanook.

THE CURMUDGEON said...

Thanks Richard.
I'm still having computer problems though, I can't write posts in the normal 'compose' mode and have to ise the html one. It's very frustrating and difficult to upload images.

Richard (of RBB) said...

I had that problem a little while back.

THE CURMUDGEON said...

How did you fix it?

Robert and the Catholics said...

•The instructions were obtuse, confusing and generally lacking...
Just look at the diagrams
•The screws, nails and assembly items were small and next to useless...
Kiwi 6 inch nail mentality.
•The quality of the 'timber' is crap.
Must be good quality to get real timber instead of particle board.

Sue says one of our clients, a small Spanish lady, regularily buys that make and builds them herself.

Richard (of RBB) said...

Robert: The Spanish instructions are obviously good.

Nanook: I don't know how I fixed it but I always seem to have bugs when operating my blog. I might try my Bass Fixer tool.

Robert and the Catholics said...

I had problems too for ages.
I don't know if there is a correlation but these days I am not on the search engine anymore and no probs. Touch wood. Not particle board.

THE CURMUDGEON said...

The diagrams made no sense
The wood is particle board of a weight and strength of matchboxes
The screws and bolts are made of 'shit' metal

Maybe your Spanish lady could visit and make the bloody things for us

Robert and the Catholics said...

As I went down to Dublin city,
At the hour of twelve at night,
Who should I see but the Spanish Lady,
Washing her feet by candle-light.
First she washed them, then she dried them
Over a fire of amber coal,
In all my life I ne'er did see
A maid so sweet about the soul.

CHORUS:
Whack fol the toora, loora laddi-o
Whack fol the toora loora lay

As I went back through Dublin city
At the hour of half-past eight
Who should I see but the Spanish Lady
Brushing her hair outside the gate.
First she brushed it, then she combed it,
On her hand was a silver comb.
In all my life I ne'er did see
A maid so fair since I did roam.

CHORUS

As I came back through Dublin city
As the sun began to set
Who should I see but the Spanish Lady
Catching a moth in a golden net.
When she saw me then she fled me
Lifting her petticoat over her knee
In all my life I ne'er did see
A maid so shy as the Spanish Lady.

CHORUS

I've wandered north and I've wandered south
By Stoneybatter and Patrick's Close
Up and around by the Gloucester Diamond
And back by Napper Tandy's house.
Old age has laid her hand on me
Cold as a fire of ashy coals
But where o where is the Spanish Lady,
Neat and sweet about the soul?