TITLE PENDING

Wainuiomata temperature dropped down to 1 degree overnight.

Richard was cold in bed - but that's a topic for a future post he will write of his sexual adventures. He just has to finalise the post title and is testing options like "Gone With The Wind", "From Rushing With Love", "Eat, Pray, Fart, Love and Oops", "My Grope Year", "The Story of Oh, Sorry" and the likeliest most favourite "I Don't Know What Came Over Me".

Rushing toddling to the wardrobe he dragged out and donned all of the clothes he could grab and cover these with his favourite dressing gown.

"You can't wear that - it's mine" said Shelley so he put back the pink silk robe and replaced it with the old beige woolen one that used to belong to his grandfather.

"I'm off to do some blogging" he told Shelley.

"Don't forget to flush and wash your hands" she replied.

"Shoosh" he thought to himself and made his way to his 'office' turning on all of the heaters that he'd recently bought, on the way.

In his 'office' he faced the daily (sometimes thrice-daily) conundrum of which toilet paper to use. This was kind of like his difficulty in choosing a blog post topic. Too soft and it had no impact. Too strong and it would only bring tears to the eyes. He chose middle of the road but discovered that as he most often used this option there was only the cardboard roll left with a scrap of crumpled paper still attached. He eyed the selection of blog bog rolls beside the toilet bowl and thought of the successes and failures that these had brought. "I measure my life in toilet rolls" he thought to himself, paraphrasing T.S. Eliot knowing that TC if he'd been there would be pleased. In actual fact TC would not have been pleased to be there.

Richard decided, after his 'first of the day' and after his first coffee of the day took him back to his 'office' that a bit of colour was needed (not that). He found the fancy toilet seat that Robert had given him for some long-ago birthday and installed it. Standing back to admire his handiwork in the well-worn spot on the bathroom floor he was caught short again so took off his dressing gown and quickly sat, knowing that this would be a long period of introspection.

After the 'introspection' Richard realised that he was still uninspired and that those other bloggers would soon be hassling him for a new post to be published. He wasn't quite ready to publish his memoir post so grabbed his favourite reading material, the 1926 edition of 'The Bass and Violin Players' Almanac which always excited him. Unsticking a couple of pages towards the back of the voluminous volume he discovered a section that he hadn't read before. 

It was an article giving advice on easily swapping between tunes, chords and arpeggios. The advice was that, even though it takes a bit of practice and the necessity to know the tune and chord progression thoroughly, it was possible to do.

"This will be handy for applying to my four unaccompanied tunes" he mused before being brought to the necessity of some more immediate handiwork.

"The job isn't finished until the paperwork is done" he said to himself smirking at his 'Nui wit.

It was getting colder despite the blast from his 9kw Heat Boss Industrial Electric Fan Heater he'd bought from Bunnings that was taking up all the space in the bath so he put his dressing gown back on even though he'd have rather had the pink silk one one on. "I'll just have to wait until Shelley is out again"" he thought.

Picking up another of his favourite reading material - "The Life of the Saints" that Robert had also given to him for a birthday or for Christmas yeras ago, Richard quickly found the well-thumbed page relating to Maria Faustyna Kowalska or Saint Faustina as she is commonly known "Cor!" he thought "I'd ......"

Image and caption courtesy of Robert's The spirited diary of a sinner

His impure thoughts (as Robert would likely say) were interrupted by a banging on his 'office' door.

"Richard! Richard! What on earth are you doing in there? I need to go." 

It was Shelley. He needed to go - well, he'd already been a couple of times but he needed to vacate ... no he had to leave his office so he tucked his 'second' favourite book behind the cistern making sure that his 'first' favourite book - 'The Bass and Violin Players' Almanac' was on prominent display and shuffled out. he felt that he had some ideas now for a blog post and started to run through it in his head:

"3 degrees in Wainuiomata. I was cold in bed. Now I'm up and wearing lots of clothes. Fortunately, we have the new heater."

He still didn't have a title for this post though - maybe it would come to him later. He headed off to his other 'office' turning on the 2-in-1 3000W Portable Electric Industrial Fan Heater and Free Standing Carpet Dryer on to get rid of the icicles hanging from the bookcase.

WHAT'S BEEN HAPPENING ON THE BLOGS?

Not a lot quantity-wise from those other bloggers and the quality hasn't improved but they do continue to add in weirdness which makes their blog posts worth a quick look at.

Robert is still in love although, as Richard suggests, it's a bit of a threesome with Jesus stuck in the middle. He's burning the candle at both ends working long hours and then doing a lot of driving to go to see other Masses. Each to their own I guess.

In his latest post which was about being in love, visiting Jesus, praying to the Virgin Mary, driving a lot and checking out other Masses he threw in this:

"There are no rest areas from Palmy to Wellington and once I was on the expressway it was just grin and bare."

        -  Robert of The spirited diary of a sinner 

Maybe those kisses on the cheek are not enough for him and he's taken to satisfying his needs in other ways:

Over on the other side (both sides are dark) Richard is still banging on about music practice and continues to obsess about bodily functions and toilets.

Richard: "I'm just going to check the blogs and write a new post"

It's just as well that you have The Curmudgeon and the many manifestations to keep you informed.

DEATH OF A CLOWN

 This song was running through my head yesterday. I remember first hearing it on the radio when I was in the fourth form at school. It struck a note with me then and still does although I haven't heard it on the radio for decades.

Why it came to mind was when taking with The Old Girl on FaceTime yesterday she said that one of the reasons that she calls me every day when she's away is because she worries about me having an accident or a 'medical event' and she won't be there to fix me. 

I then told her that, funny as it may seem, only that morning I'd gone up into the attic and, when coming down for some reason, instead of backing toward the attic steps (14 foot high ceiling) I approached them head on.

As I got to the edge I put my knee through the insulation Batts instead of on a joist and lost my balance. I was heading head first down the steps but managed to grab one of the hinges and, precariously, turn around to get my feet on the ladder. Jeez! It was close. If I'd headed down headfirst I might have broken my neck or worse, broken one of The Old Girl's ornaments that she has placed on just about every surface in the house.

"The old fortune teller lies dead on the floor
Nobody needs fortunes told anymore"

She was silent for a moment and then just said "See!"

OH NO! MORE DONALD TRUMP STUFF

It will come as no surprise to reader(s) to learn that Donald Trump is a big bag of wind.

He likes to talk big but is in reality a weak and ineffective man. He's a bully and likes to try to dominate people with a mixture of bluff and bluster and schoolyard-type name calling but, when challenged invariably backs down.

During his several careers - real estate salesman, casino operator, shyster, showman and reality television performer he developed his 'skills' in convincing people that he's strong (he had a book ghost-written for him purporting that he's a great deal maker) but in recent times, particularly in the public spotlight of politics the cracks are showing.

From an early age his cowardice was showing, from dodging the draft for Vietnam to assaulting and abusing women. He attacks from positions of strength and uses his lawyers and many, many lawsuits to get his way. He does this while  having an infatuation with world 'strongmen' like Putin, Xi Jinping, Orban, Maduro, Kim Jong Un, Erdogan and Bin Salman to name a few. He also often refers to past leaders like Hitler and Mussolini in a favourable light. What a tosser.

It's interesting to see him when face to face with these leaders as he tends to cow down to them and builds up a fantasy that they 'love each other'. Really, he sounds like one of Robert's Christian mates. To date we haven't seen him facing up to those other bullies and instead he turns on America's allies to try and show strength and he tends to do this from the safety of his Oval office and from behind the 'Resolution' desk he likes so much.

Trump is a liar but that's not news. In regards to being a convincing leader he pretends that he knows best, will be strong and that America's enemies are quaking in their boots. He once pretended that he'd been against the Iraq War (after the event) to try and show that only he knew best. In fact he had made no such pronouncements before his run for the presidency in 2016. It was just another of his popiulist ploys as MAGA voters and supporters were upset that USA didn't achieve what was promised and were looking to get out of the Middle East.

When Trump made it to the presidency he was way out of his depth and didn't know what decisions to make other than to overturn everything Obama had done from health care to international deals. This is why the Paris Climate Accord and the Iran nuclear deal were scrapped - a legacy that everyone is now suffering from.

Trump's silly cabinet in his first term quickly learned how incapable he was and they tried to teach him what to do but his arrogance got in the way. He ignored advice on everything including, disastrously, advice on COVID.

His naivety when it came to foreign policy was breathtaking as he aligned himself with traditional enemies like Russia and North Korea, turned his back on traditional allies like Europe and treaties like NATO and made a mess of building a relationship with China. As bad as this first term was however it was nothing compared to what he's been doing in the second term with an even sillier and more underqualified cabinet.  His Russian love has been damaging to the Ukraine situation. His China baiting is likely to set USA back economically for decades. His attacks on Canada and Mexico mean that any strong North American treaties, deals and alliances have also been set back for decades and Europe has been sent reeling from his stupid tariffs, further attacks on NATO and other alliances and agreements. The guy is a fucking idiot ... or, as many have suggested, a Russian stooge.

What Trump has done in his second term already is to seriously damage the economy, directly through the imposition of new tariffs and indirectly through the immigrant expulsion programmes. Both of these have caused civil unrest with anti-Trump protests superseding in numbers and outreach those of the 1960s and 1970s racial equality and anti Vietnam movements. The platform, while peaceful now has the likelihood of becoming full-blown civil unrest, riots or revolution. Maybe this is what Donald the stooge wants.

While this is going on three major wars are raging: Russia vs Ukraine which Trump foolishly said he could sort out in a day; Israel vs Gaza which is only getting worse since his election as President; and now the Israel vs Iran potential all-out war where Netanyahu is playing Trump for a fool and, to use another metaphor, leading him by the nose.

Trump is looking ineffective and stupid over this. He is wheeling out his silly and overused "In two weeks we will have a decision" promise while waiting for other people to get something done. He's dithering and only comes out strong if he sees an advantage to him personally - not necessarily for the good of the USA or the rest of the world. If Israel's missile attacks on Iran had been a complete failure Trump would have already turned his back on Israel but as there have been some successes he's hedging his bets - waiting for a result that he didn't have to risk looking bad in making a wrong decision. Of course if he does nothing and everything works out fine he will take  credit for it. 

The guy is a big bag of wind but, like most balloons will likely deflate sooner than later.

HE'S AT IT AGAIN

 The pedantic old ex-school teacher who obviously doesn't have enough things to do to fill in his days now is taking to making silly little criticisms of other people's blog posts.

Sheesh!

HAPPY NEW YEAR

 

... wrote Richard in a comment on his blog in response to a comment I made that I had woken early on the chance of seeing Matariki in the dawn sky but cloud obscured it. I said that I wasn't really bothered as there are plenty of other constellations to see on a clearer night.

I wasn't being 'anti-Maori' and Richard wasn't being censurious in these comments but it did get me thinking.

I'm a centrist in my beliefs whether they be political, social, cultural or religious*. Some people might consider this being a fence sitter and it being something to be ashamed of but I see it as a way of getting a better view of the world without being mired in ractionary biases.

In politics I do lean to the left a bit but make sure that I read at least some of the 'right' news in order to balance my beliefs. Unfortunately not enough people do this and so we are forever in a 'he said ... she said' type of situation where conflict results and no resolution can be had. Look at Israel/Gaza and Iran/ rest of world  to see how current biases will never resolve these.

In religion which, no real surprise there, politics are bound up in differing beliefs, as long as closed-mindedness dominates free thinking then nothing will change for the better. Even within religious faiths there are scisms. Islam has 73 different sects with the major ones - Sunni, Shi'a, Ibadi, Ahmadiyya, and Sufism being at ideological and political odds with each other. Our own Robert - a Catholic, in his blog posts constantly renounces not only other religions but other Christian ones as well. It's no wonder then that historically right up to today we have had violent suppressions and massacres within Christianity as seen in 'The Troubles' in Ireland and Catholic vs Protestant wars in Europe. I think I'm a pluralist when it comes to religion and believe that religion can be a glue that connects people but that  cultural and religious diversity can be a positive thing that can create a common society. Oh, I'm also a dreamer...

.. but fortunately "I'm not the only one."

Getting back to Matariki, I'm glad that Maori cultural and religious traditions are being respected and that we have a public holiday highlighting this. I'm not going to become all Maori about it though just like I don't do all the nutty church-going stuff that Robert does at Christmas and Easter. I like the holidays and respect that some people have more invested in it but It doesn't mean that I have to become involved. Sheesh!

*I see religion in a positive light when it's being a guiding force for people who need ethical and moral direction but in a negative light when it force-feeds claptrap and division to naive and anxious followers

IRAN *

 * So far away?

"And I ran, I ran so far away

I just ran, I ran all night and day

I couldn't get away

A cloud appears above your head

A beam of light comes shining down on you

Shining down on you

The cloud is moving nearer still"

Maybe there's more to that Flock of Seagulls song than I realised.

Iran has never been far from the news and certainly not out of mind in my lifetime. Now it's "moving nearer still" thanks to that idiot Donald Trump's 'leadership' and Israel's megalomania.

Trump's way out of his depth as he's stuck between Israel's demands for a strike against Iran and the MAGA- American isolationist preferences.

“We believe that the United States of America and the president of the United States have an obligation to make sure that the region is going to a positive way and that the world is free from Iran that possesses (a) nuclear weapon.

        - Former Israeli Defense Minister Yoav Gallant 

"I don’t want the US enmeshed in another Middle East war that doesn’t serve our interests."

        - MAGA spokesperson Tucker Carlson

 

The left wing movements in USA also prefer keeping out of the conflict

"The US must not get dragged into another of Netanyahu’s wars.”

       - Democrat Senator Bernie Sanders

In recent times the Iraq and Afghan wars and America's pathetic performance in them strengthened the opposition to US involvement in overseas wars and helped Trump come to power, twice. But, America being the confused and contradictory nation it is also has Trump-supporting ultra conservatives (hawks) who want to convince Trump to attack an Iran that has been weakened by Israeli forces and to once and for all deliver Iran a death blow and end its nuclear programme. Trump, being Trump, a weak and unconvincing leader procrastinates and or vacillates hoping that someone else will make the hard calls.

"I may go in. I may not go in. Nobody knows what I'm going to do."

        - Donald Trump ...

 ... including himself I guess.

Let's not forget that it was the orange idiot who set up the current inflammatory situation by walking away from Obama's previous US nuclear deal with Iran in his first term which both delighted Israel and emboldened Iran. Great work Donald.

As A Flock of Seagulls sang: "The cloud is moving nearer still."

GOOD MOANING

 That old complainer from Wainuiomoaner was on the blogs this morning having a whinge about Robert and his fellow cleaners taking no interest in his wittering writing.

See: THE BLOG THAT'S NOT POPULAR WITH CLEANERS

He's been moaning recently about not having any posting topics but here I think he's cracked it.

A series on 'THE BLOG THAT'S NOT POPULAR WITH ... (put category here)' could go on ad finitum which would keep the old fellow moaning and happy.

MISTY

I woke up to a whiteout this morning:

 

There's supposed to be a mountain in the background here - Mount Aubrey

Ditto here - Mount Manaia

No bay to be seen

There's been no sound of the incoming planes to our local airport which suggests that Auckland and further afield are fogbound as well. I'm glad that I'm not trying to fly anywhere today.

I'm flabbergasted to see cars going along without using headlights. WTF?

I was planning to drive into town this morning but will now wait until the mist clears - probably by the afternoon. Not only is it unsafe to drive in these conditions because of the narrow and windy roads but it will be near impossible to see some goose coming the other way who hasn't got his headlights on. Sheesh!

"SOMETIMES YOU WILL NEVER KNOW THE VALUE OF A MOMENT, UNTIL IT BECOMES A MEMORY" - (DR SEUSS)

 Richard seems a bit testy today.

No doubt the protests in the USA have been bringing back bad memories for him...

... where the Victoria University Students' Union came out in protest against his role in The White Sport Coat and Pink Carnation Society.

It's not surprising really as it must have been a blow for the old fellow at the time - the dissolution of a vehicle he saw as an opportunity of 'getting the sex'*

Maybe Shelley can give him a smooch or something.

* A sentiment shared by the other members of the society who however left it to 'The King' to take the rap.

THE TRUTH

I thought that the readers might not be able to handle a new series given their recent distractions and lack of involvement in what is truly important - blogging - so have decided to pack a few things that came to mind today in this one post.

I'm cooking a Bolognese sauce tonight and will have this with spaghetti topped with Parmesan cheese. I haven't cooked this for quite some time and tonight, as The Old Girl is still in Christchurch can add in the little bit of extras that aren't really supposed to be in a traditional Bolognese sauce. 

If you're wondering what's supposed to be in a traditional Bolognese sauce, and I was. here's what Aunty Google told me:

For the traditional bolognese sauce

1 tbsp olive oil.
4 rashers smoked streaky bacon. finely chopped.
2 medium onions. finely chopped.
2 carrots. trimmed and finely chopped.
2 celery sticks. finely chopped.
2 garlic cloves. finely chopped.
2-3 sprigs rosemary. leaves picked and finely chopped.
500g beef mince.

OK, got that ... or most of it.

Here are my edits:

1 tbsp olive oil. I used a lemon and oregano infused olive oil
4 rashers smoked streaky bacon. finely chopped. I didn't use bacon
2 medium onions. finely chopped. I used one half of a small onion
2 carrots. trimmed and finely chopped. I used a half of a carrot - grated
2 celery sticks. finely chopped. I did not use celery
2 garlic cloves. finely chopped.
2-3 sprigs rosemary. leaves picked and finely chopped. I used  dried rosemary, oregano and thyme
500g beef mince. I used lamb mince

I added a can of Italian tomatoes, some chilli sauce, some Leggo's passata, some piquante peppers, some spring onion and chopped kalamata olives.

****************

OK, that's the background. While preparing this dish my thoughts wandered back to a guy I met in my career who was a bit of a prat and I thought about him and other odd people I've encountered over my working life. A series, believe me would be a thing and I have enough material to spin it out for some time but, as I said, you readers are slipping a bit in your cognitive abilities so we'll limit my recollections to snapshots.

One

The guy who triggered this was a fat and pompous Englishman. He was an agent for a major UK gin company and I was the brand manager in New Zealand for this. His name was Nigel. This was in the mid 1980s. As I said he was pompous and the few days I had with him on his visit were difficult. Meetings were insufferable and wheeling him out to visit buyers and customers onerous. One evening I and some colleagues took him to an Italian restaurant as he had professed a wish to eat pasta. At the table, after he had ordered spaghetti Bolognese he asked the waiter if he could have a large serviette which the waiter brought him. He rejected this and asked for a tablecloth. Yes, you heard me - a tablecloth! He was a large guy, kind of like a grown up version of Billy Bunter and had all the grace and bluster of an over-privileged public school boy.

We soon saw why he asked for the tablecloth which he stiffed in the top of his shirt, because he ate like a pig and sloshed tomato Bolognese sauce down his front  and across the table much to everyone's embarrassment. I was pleased to see him go at the end of his visit.

Two

In the later 1980s I was on a 'field trip' to London checking out specialty wine and spirit companies to get some ideas for establishing a boutique operation in New Zealand. I was general manager of the fine wines and spirit division of the company I worked for and had been provided with invitations to a couple of premium contacts. After some meetings and discussions I had a day trip around London with one of their company reps. This guy was like something out of a P. G. Wodehouse novel, wearing a three piece suit and a bowler hat like the guy at the right in this photo:

Being London and in the business district he didn't drive  a car but instead we went to the various appointments with his customers - wine and spirit shops, restaurant and a couple of nightclubs - by taxi (London black cab) It was both fun and educational. 

In the early afternoon he proposed that we should have lunch which was a good idea as I was hungry and felt like a sandwich (see earlier post). His idea of lunch though was a slap up meal in a Soho restaurant. He said that he was paying and it was on expenses so I gathered that he didn't often eat like this and was going to make the most of it. We went to a fancy eating place and he proceeded to order, for both of us, a five course meal with beer to start, a couple of bottles of good claret in the middle and cognacs to finish. I was stuffed and smashed combined but he, of the greater girth (at that time of my life) didn't appear to be fazed. I toddled off back to my hotel pleased that I had no dinner commitments that evening. This guy was a joy and, as I said like a Wodehouse or a Evelyn Waugh character.

Three

Hold on ... this is looking like a series after all. Stay posted!

LE DOCTEUR QUI

 I viewed this today and it's so good it's worth sharing:

"YOU BEUDY!"

 ... I yelled at the TV this morning when watching a replay match of the NZ women's rugby team beating the Aussi women's rugby team a few days back.

Obviously I yelled this as one of our wonderfully talented young women players scored another try.

Braxton Sorrenson-McGee

I was reminded of how, yeras, sorry, years ago I frightened the hell out of The Old Girl's godson. I was watching the All Blacks playing Wales and the Barrett brothers set up and scored a brilliant try. The godson was quietly playing with a train set on the floor in front of the TV and, inexplicably was showing no interest in the match even though he was about 3 yeras old then. WTF?

"YOU BEUDY!" I bellowed and the kid just about hit the roof sending his train off the rails.

The outcome of the rugby match was predictable with the All Blacks scoring seven tries to Wales' one with a score of 54:16 but it was still an exciting match to watch. Here's an imagined outtake from the commentary:

"The ball bounces short of touch and is scooped up by Beauden Barrett. He runs and passes to Jordie Barrett who evades a tackle then another and makes 20 metres up field. Jordie Barrett passes to Beauden Barrett who passes out to some other player. The other player sends a pass to Jordie Barrett but this is intercepted by Hugh Williams. Williams passes to James Williams who in turn passes to Steve Williams. Williams sees a gap and deftly chips the ball ahead but Jordie Barrett races across and intercepts the kick, quickly passing to Beauden Barrett ..... "

The Old Girl came to see what the fuss was and made disparaging remarks about my 'parenting' skills.

I guess that I wouldn't be able to do grandfatherly things or teaching things like Richard does.

IS IT JUST ME? ...

 ... well it can't be as you know I'm easy going and don't make a fuss over things.

Yesterday I had some time to fill as our real estate agent was showing some people through the house at midday so I went into town. As it was lunchtime and as I was feeling peckish - "you know, esurient" I thought that a sandwich and a cup of coffee was a good idea.

I drove to the Basin area which is Whangarei's marina surrounded by shops and restaurants. I easily found a carpark and didn't have to pay any parking fee because I have an 'over 70' sticker on my windscreen. I then proceeded to visit three cafes, queuing up to view the offerings in the display cabinets. Generally I like the food in these cafes with one making the best cheese scones I've ever tasted and another making great muffins but ... I wanted a sandwich. Just an ordinary sandwich not some chef's fantasy.

I ended up walking out of all three cafes, not because their food offerings were bad but because they did not cater to my immediate need. I didn't want a massive croissant, any form of pie, quiche or savoury tart all accompanied with other stuff - I wanted a sandwich. A simple sandwich. A club sandwich would have done but there were no sandwiches on offer. Sheesh!

I left my car in the Basin parking area and walked off into town proper calling in to nearly a dozen other cafes and eateries. Guess what? No sandwiches just massive- portion sized pies, savouries, salads, quiches, tarts and Robert's god only knows what. All accompanied by salads and other stuff. I tell you - we're getting to be like America where if you want a simple sandwich in a cafe-style place you have to get it with soup and salad and maybe a side order of fries. Sheesh!

I certainly got my walking quota in, criss-crossing town and about to give up my quest when I found, on a busy road and away from the 'nicer' parts of town a bakery operated by Vietnamese people. It was named Konnie's Bakery Kafe (with 'k's where 'c's should have been). It was a large place with display cabinets stuffed with 'old-fashioned' style food - sandwiches, filled rolls, club sandwiches, savoury pies, sausage rolls and all sorts of cakes that I remember from my school days - all at sensible prices. 

I bought two cheese sandwiches and a sausage roll - $8.50 total which I thought to be fair.

I understand the difficulties of running small businesses as we've owned and operated two in the past. It's hard to make a profit in cafes as rent, wages and overheads are high so every opportunity has to be taken to increase margins. This is why those fancy-schmancy cafes have resorted to making bigger items - huge scones, muffins, savouries and pies etc. and added all sorts of things on the plate to pad out the optics and the price. I get it but ... I won't buy it. To get some plain fare like I found' customers are being forced to the fringe parts of town or, as The Old Girl said, to buy their snacks and lunch in service stations.

The more observant reader will have remembered that I wrote of this before when looking for a sandwich in Christchurch. See: I'M OVER FANCYSCHMANCY

POLAND IS JUST NOT PULLING ITS WEIGHT

 I had a look at the blog stats today and was disappointed in Poland's performance.

Frankly it could do better. I mean, even Austria which is a country of Nazis takes time to view my blog more than them. WTF? Don't the Poles know that I went to school with the children of Polish refugees and once kissed Helen who had an unpronounceable Polish surname? To be fair, she kissed me and we were both about 7 yeras old but still...

... maybe Robert's friend Stefan can put a good word in for me when he's not busy looking for golf balls in streams and doing gnome impressions.

LIGHTEN UP (PART TWO)

Of course you'll remember that post I wrote back in March about the blogs becoming too serious and that we need to inject a bit of humour.

You don't?

Oh! Never mind, here's a link to it:

LIGHTEN UP (PART ONE)

Well, I never did manage to download a free (and reliable) cartoon maker programme - sorry, my bad ...

... and my recommendation that you readers should sin a lot fell on deaf ears with at last 50% of you.

Having fun and no sinning here!

Have fun and keep your clothes on.

Have fun Rob and don't sin.

Have to run, have fun, no sin done.

Remember: You can have a lot of fun without necessarily sinning!

        etc.

        All sign-offs by Rob the spirited diarist and general party pooper.

Richard's sign-offs have been, while not admonishing sinning, been equally prosaic

... from the obvious:

I guess that's it from me.

and: 

I certainly haven't been a renegrade today!

... to the delusional: 

Ah well, I've entertained you enough for this morning.

... and the honest: 

I'm off.

 

After a couple of months worth of dire and frankly unfunny (don't blame Frank) posting - and not all of the serious posts were from me - I decided to resurrect the 'LIGHTEN UP' series.

The last post (there's a pun for you) I wrote titled 'LANGUAGE', going by the first and probably only comment from others, highlights the fact that humour is languishing and frankly (There's Frank again) unrecognisable to the dour and ironically-challenged Huttites.

Never mind, I'll ....

HOLD ON!

... I can hear from the lounge that THE CHASE has started so I'll have to pack this in now, vacate the study and prepare my dinner (tuna pizza) while finishing my second (large) glass of chardonnay from a bottle with a label on it that reads Villa Maria Cellar Selection Hawkes Bay 2022.

Having fun with loads of sinning - I certainly haven't been retrograde today.

LANGUAGE

 

That's a good song which kind of brings me to the theme of this post.

Language.

Robert uses language but, at times I kind of wonder what language that is. At least when Richard falls off the English wagon we can identify that he's landed in a big pile of Italian stuff but ... have a look at Robert's latest post here:

WTF?

So, I literally died when I read this.

It's like, 110% silly - I mean, its like approximately 99.999999985% nonsensical.

Back in the day I personally, you know, ticked all the boxes when it came to using language properly.

Going forward I'm literally gutted to see the sound of new words and expressions that absolutely, from the get-go have no meaning. Do you know what? I'd like to take it to the next level and say that it's a no-brainer that young whippersnappers today don't engage their brains and ruse random terms to annoy older people like me. Go figure!

Good vocabulary is to die for, literally. Users of bad language should of, with all due respect, checked out  the meanings before engaging their tongues. Just saying.

They should take it to the next level irregardless of what their pears think and look for completely unique sayings that they can own. They can then be comfortable in their own skins and reach a safe haven. 

It is what it is. Sorry, not sorry.

NEW POST - THE POLEMICAL CURMUDGEON

 

THE MOUSE THAT ROARED

LEST WE FORGET

We are approaching the 80th anniversary of the atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki during the second world war.

American bombing raids on Hiroshima (August 6, 1945) and Nagasaki (August 9, 1945) killed tens of thousands in the initial blasts and many more later due to burns and radiation poisoning.  

There is no doubt that these bombings had a profound effect on the war, Japanese society and world history. Supporters claimed that they were necessary to bring an end to the war with minimal casualties and critics that they were unnecessary for the war's end and were in fact a war crime.

America's intentions have never been clearly explained but there's no doubt that Russian expansionism was a key factor. The Soviet Union's entry into the war against Japan perhaps was more influential in causing Japan's surrender than the bombs because they faced a new threat rather than a mediator or even a future ally. The USA more likely used the atomic weapons to intimidate the Soviet Union as an early stages of the subsequent Cold War where nuclear weapons were used for detente. Its monopoly on nuclear weapons only lasted four years before the Soviet Union detonated an atomic bomb in September 1949 and from then on a tit for tat 'war' went on with hydrogen bombs and more powerful nuclear variants being brandished by both sides along with 'tactical' nuclear armaments being adopted by seven other nations. This brandishing acted as a warning and a deterrent for many years and as schoolkids we were constantly reminded of the threat and danger of a worldwide nuclear war via films and even in school teaching. That was then ...

... this is now.

Now the USA is falling apart being governed by an orange idiot with little understanding of history, statesmanship, diplomacy and the finer aspects of detente.

On the other hand Russia, which is also falling apart, is being governed by a megalomaniac who is intelligent enough to understand history, statesmanship, diplomacy and the finer aspects of detente but, as a self aggrandising and aging gangster doesn't give a fuck.

Should we be worried?

Hell yes.

Trump having control of a nuclear arsenal (no matter how aged and run-down it is), aided by the most unqualified and stupid people in key positions than the US government has ever seen before is like giving a cut throat razor to a monkey.

The current geopolitical situation with a continually volatile Middle East, a wounded Russian bear bristling over injuries sustained from a non-compliant Ukraine, Chinese posturing, North Korean idiocy, Pakistan and India sparring and Iranian nuclear ambitions - all not being curtailed by a USA that's in ferment worries the shit out of me.

New USA plans for upgrading its nuclear warfare capability in a massive modernisation programme including bombers, missiles, submarines and a 'golden shield' using space technology will take decades to be completed even if they manage to allocate the trillions of dollars necessary to upgrade.

New communication strategies and international agreements are a likely outcome in the short term and I worry that New Zealand's decades long anti-nuclear position is in jeopardy especially if we continue with a marshmallow leader like Chris Luxon.

Oh well, as Jack Reacher say's "hope for the best but plan for the worst". Maybe everyone should just pander to Trump's ego and give him a new hair dryer for his locks and take that razor off him.

 

OH SNOW, OH SNOW, OH SNOW OH SNOW SNOW SNOW ...

 

SNOW IN NORTHLAND?

I don't know but it certainly has felt cold enough over the last few days.

Sure, the temperature readings have only come down to 7 degrees but ...

SOME DAMN JAM!*

 * A passing reference to Richard's recent post - 'NO DAMN JAM!'. This post though contains real jam.

The weather has worsened today - rain and it's getting colder. Perfect!

Why perfect?

Well, I've been planning to make some more chilli jam and as it involves some time in the kitchen and having to keep a close eye on things - sterilising jars, crushing, pureeing and chopping the ingredients, simmering and stirring the mixture etc., I didn't want the distraction of a nice day outside.

The cooking has gone well. I used a dozen decent sized red chillies from the freezer. I was afraid that I might have gone overboard with these and so added a bit more caster sugar to the mix to take the edge off. The flavour is fantastic but a bit on the hot side. I got six 310ml jars from this but will need to buy some more mild chilli relish from the supermarket for The Old Girl to blend with mine to her taste. Anatoth make a good one.

This jam is great on crackers or toast with smoked salmon.

I'm making a smoked salmon pizza tonight so will add some to the pesto spread on the pizza base. Yummy.

THE REAL ISSUES (part one)

THANKS FOR COMING

 "Thanks for coming" is a statement I often make at tennis to opposing players who have lost a game to me.

They think I'm being a smartarse but they don't know the background to this.

Years ago a young guy who worked for me, Rodney, was quite clever but maybe was on the Aspergers spectrum. He was working as a storeman and shop assistant and was very capable but doing a job way below his intellectual capabilities.

Rodney had a quiet sense of humour and often made little jokes for his own amusement that very few people understood. When he served a customer he would finish with saying "thanks for coming" with a wry smile at the corner of his mouth. The customers were often a bit surprised and would mumble "that's OK" or something similar. I used to give Rodney 'that look' and he would just shake his head and amble away.

Rodney reminded me a bit of Rob Gosney from Murray Robert's & Co, also a shop assistant in a wine and spirit store who had a similar sense of humor and was likely on that Asperger's spectrum.

Rob was the one who coined the 'bottled in the wire wrapper' term he used when selling a bottle of Gilson brandy to a customer.

Back in the Murray Robert's days Gilson bottles had wire wrapping for protection

 of the glass bottle

Some customers almost changed their purchase decision thinking that they'd rather have a brandy bottled in France rather than the Wairarapa. Rob would just smile to himself.

Richard often mentions this as he's fascinated by the expression.

This is why I occasionally drop it into my blog posts or something similar as my little joke. For example I put a comment on his latest post that, to me, references this:

I trust that this was helpful.*

* The Curmudgeons Inc.ⓒ takes pride in being able to inform readers of the little, but important bits of life.