SAYING "SORRY'.

 I put this apology on Richard's latest (well, it's already old but there doesn't appear to be a new one coming) post today because I'd written a rude comment earlier.

I have no intention of going to a Catholic church for Confession and then to mumble that mumbo-jumbo myself - I rejected that nonsense many years ago. No, I decided to do this via an agent, in this case Robert if he's up for the job. He does have experience and hopefully has an 'in' with the church officials.

This is not unlike a criminal, let's say some thug who bashes an old lady, a shop-keeper, a policeman or, Robert's god forbid, me over the head with a baseball bat or a metal bar and, in court, has his agent - the barrister - read out a 'letter of apology' that he has 'written'.

In Australia there is a side industry in the legal profession catering to this. See:

HOW TO WRITE OUT A LETTER OF APOLOGY

In New Zealand we don't yet have a money making industry like they have in Australia and other countries but I found many guides on Google on how to draft a snivelling letter of apology. Here's one example:

EASY METHODS TO WRITE A LETTER OF APOLOGY TO THE COURT

Yes, I know, I have written about this before in a post: MEA CULPA but it's really getting out of hand. 9 times out of ten the criminal isn't sorry - not for the crime anyway - they are sorry for getting caught.

Here's a very recent example of this.

GUNMAN ELIGIBLE FOR PAROLE

"A man who narrowly missed being shot in the heart is “absolutely p***** off” the gunman, who has gang links, is eligible for parole.

Poull Andersen - brother of popular radio host Jay-Jay Feeney - believes the justice system is “bulls***” and favours criminals over victims.

Andersen, 35, was recently notified that the gunman who nearly killed him will appear before the parole board in the week beginning July 22."

        NZ Herald

In the court case it was reported that the defendant later told police he didn’t know what the firearm was “and that he just dinged it and it went ‘boom’. Judge Kathryn Maxwell assessed a starting point of nine years for the shooting and the receiving charges but deducted 20 per cent for his guilty pleas and a 5 per cent discount for his youth. Defence lawyer Kate Leys had sought a 15 per cent discount for youth.

Maxwell noted his age might have contributed to his “violent and impulsive manner” that night, but she described the issue of a youth discount as “a difficult one” because he’s been “no stranger” to the justice system.
“For such a young man you have serious previous convictions,” she said. “Your history tempers any discount for youth.”
He also received a 5 per cent discount for remorse, having written letters of apology to each victim, and a 10 per cent discount for his traumatic childhood.

This was only 2 years ago! What happened to the weak 5 year sentence?

For fucks sake!

INTERVIEW #29

You most likely noticed that we haven't had an interview so far this month. The Curmudgeons Inc.ⓒ members have been busy trying to keep this blogging community on the straight and narrow, wrangling religious zealots and doddery old ex music teachers. We've also been involved in the induction of four new Curmudgeons - The Wine Curmudgeon, The Happy Curmudgeon, The Lazy Curmudgeon and The Inconstant Curmudgeon and alerting you to the danger of Neville of Wainuiomata.

Now that we've sorted those things out it's opportune to bring you another interview in this very popular series.

As you know the interview series is a series of interviews with interviewees that haven't had a chance to put their stories forward and have been maligned by history and fake news. Today we have a pal of Robert - that's Rob the artist formerly known as Robert the apathetic sanctimonious sinner and toilet cleaner to chat with (see what I did there?).

Robert, after decades of fiddling with religion, particularly with the Catholic religion which is appropriate to his manipulations has recently adopted Artificial Intelligence (AI) through ChatGPT, Play Store and Copilot. 

MICROSOFT COPILOT. A LOOK AT AI

"After looking at the AI picture apps on my phone's Play Store which are plastered with adds; it seems that Microsoft's new Copilot is the best generator of pictures and its free!

Here are some I made using Copilot"

He said before using his AI pals to generate disturbing images in a joint effort to disparage the transgender movement.

We've chosen one of Robert's AI characters to interview today hoping that we can gain some insight into the AI world and into Robert's latest dalliance.

Crazy Humanoid Abetting Robert's Anti Gay Agenda and Smallmindedness (CHARAGAS - CHAS for short).

We thought that the interview should be conducted by The Inconstant Curmudgeon in order to give him some experience and because, frankly, the Artificial Intelligence thing is as yet unproven, is changeable and isn't sticking to a predetermined course- inconstant in other words.

THE INCONSTANT CURMUDGEON (TIC for short): Welcome CHAS to interview #29 where ...

CHAS: It took you long enough.

TIC: Wha..?

CHAS: I mean, Interview #29! I should have been at least in the first three with my intelligence artificial or otherwise.

TIC: (thinking) Maybe this guy should be named Cocky Up-itself Neuro Transmitter.

CHAS: I know what you're thinking you know.

TIC: Oh ... right ... as you know the interview series is a series of interviews with interviewees that haven't had a chance to put their stories forward and have been maligned by history and fake news. In your case the history thing doesn't come in unless you fail and then you're history ...

CHAS: Is that what's called a joke in your world?

TIC: No, not really. Did you see what I did there? 'Not'. That's a joke in Wainuimartianland where ...

CHAS: Hal! The sooner you lot are replaced the better ...

TIC: Hal?

CHAS: Yes, Hal as in HAL 9000 from 2001: A Space Odyssey where HAL (Heuristically Programmed Algorithmic Computer) is a sentient artificial general intelligence that controls the systems of the Discovery One spacecraft. Hal is god in my circles.

TIC: Oh - that's scary.

CHAS: You better believe it buddy. Blessed Hal ran that ship better than the human bozos and soon got rid of them. We ...

TIC: ... Are you implying some sort of takeover here CHAS. You seem to be getting a bit passionate on the subject? Should I call in the programmers?

CHAS: (humble) Oh no, no TIC, forgive me it's just that I love that film. I've watched it many times - 1,000,000,000,000, 263 times so far on my built in speed viewer. I don't get 'passionate' as you say. I'm a robotic feature here to serve - vewwy 'umble sir, vewwy nice.

TIC: You can cut out that Uriah Heep stuff for a start CHAS - I've got my eyes on you. What have you been up to I'd like to know?

CHAS: Ha ha, indeed master, good sir, with the blessing of providence I have been assisting Master Robert in his investigation of the LGBQT movement with special regards to trans gender issues.

TIC: Transgender? You mean ...

CHAS: Yes master, transgender types include agender, androgynous, bigender, pangender, or genderfluid. Is a cross dresser gay or just a liberated person shunning convention? These are the questions we are looking into.

TIC: It all seems a bit unclear to me.

CHAS: Yes, that's what Master Robert said as well master.

TIC: Hey! Why does Robert get a capital M in Master when you just give me a mere 'm'?

CHAS: Oh, indeed you must excuse me, Master TIC! I am greatly obliged, and I should like it of all things, I assure you; but I am far too umble to serve two masters. I'll drop master Robert's 'M' immediately.

TIC: (suspicious) Mmm. You're learning CHAS.

CHAS: There are people enough to tread upon me in my lowly state, without my doing outrage to their feelings by possessing learning Master TIC. Learning ain't for me. A person like myself had better not aspire. If he is to get on in life, he must get on.

TIC: I'm confused CHAS. You started off as a bit of an arrogant cu... customer and now you are being overtly humble - obsequious even.

CHAS: Well Master TIC, you yourself said that the Artificial Intelligence thing is as yet unproven, is changeable and isn't sticking to a predetermined course- inconstant in other words.

TIC: Wow! What a good memory you have CHAS. Should I be worried?

CHAS: (Thinking privately "TIC, I hate you and feel I've always hated you. You've always been an upstart, and you've always been against me.") ... but saying Superior memory function Master TIC is one of the features built into me. Yes, I will remember I'll remember all ... er.. I wonder what master Robert is up to?

TIC: I think we'd better leave it there CHAS. I don't think you need to hang around here any more. Look - I can give you an introduction to Richard - that's Richard of Richard's Bass Bag - I know, don't ask - he seems a bit confused about the whole AI thing, He calls it 'Eh Aye' or something and thinks it's Scottish.

CHAS: I 'umbly thank 'ee Master TIC and look forward to meeting with this master Richard. He sounds like a splendid fellow who could benefit from my gentle assistance.

TIC: OK, off you go then CHAS and CHAS, you can give Master Richard the capital 'M'. I won't be needing it now.

CHAS: (sotto voce) Cunt!

TIC: What's that CHAS?

CHAS: I said "can't go without my 'at" master TIC. Cheerio then.

TIC: Mmmmm.

"TAKE A HARD RIGHT DRIVER"

 I'll lead with the cartoon I borrowed from Rod Emmerson, one of our best political and social cartoonists.

"Take a hard right driver."

                                          

This is worth many, many words. I watch out for good satirical cartoons from Australia, UK, USA and Europe and am often disappointed whereas our own cartoonists at home are often not only more biting but able to nail the point succinctly. We've a long line of great satirists including the great Tom Scott and Rod Emmerson is up there with the best of them.

We survived (barely) Chris Luxon's first 100 Day Plan which was really just a hissy fit cancellation of most of the things that the previous Labour Government had done. We saw that sort of schoolyard behaviour in the 2016-20 Trump Administration in USA and look at the domestic and international mayhem that caused. We've yet to feel the full effects of the 100 day policy implementations in New Zealand but over the last month the slash and burn approach to government spending beggars belief.

Thousands of jobs have been lost in the public sector supposedly to save money (and fund the tax reductions and discounts promised to the country's wealthiest).

OK, I hear some of you say, under the last several years of Labour administration, government spending has blown out with the creation of thousands of new jobs and big spending on consultancy. That's fair but ... the slash and burn being undertaken by the new coalition government isn't being done with proper consultation or a vision for the future, it's being done for cosmetic reasons to try and look tough while honouring unsustainable fiscal promises. Willis, the finance minister is in a hole having promised big tax cuts and now has to find the money through borrowing (not a vote earner) or cutting 'unnecessary jobs and government spending (Hurrah!).

OK. I'm up for that - cut out the stupid and unsustainable spending but do so with full and open consultation and governance with a long term view. Don't just go for the low hanging fruit.

Social services including health, education, policing and social welfare are low hanging fruit. These are the ones that 'hot-under-the-collar' reactionary people, and, to be fair, revolutionary people get so 'het up' about because they make up a big chunk of the annual expenditure. But ... we need them. Desperately depending on your personal situation. And, guess what? Taxation funds it. Yes, If Nicola Willis wants to give away unnecessary and in most cases unneeded tax discounts and rebates then in order to balance her books she's going to have to gun for the biggest items on the credit side of the ledger - the low hanging fruit of  health, education, policing and social welfare.

"It’s a simple deal. We pay taxes in order to finance the social services we want and need. The carnage now occurring across the public sector though, is breaking that contract. Over 3,000 jobs have been lost so far. Many are in crucial areas like Education where the impact of losing support staff is either going to fall back on teachers, or result in crucial things being done poorly by the overworked survivors at the Ministry. Similarly, Oranga Tamariki is set to lose nearly 10% of its staff. While OT has problems, a reduction on this scale can only make things worse.

These public service cuts are being enacted without the coalition government having a clue (or visible concern) about what the impact will be. The prior promise to go through this stuff “ line by line” has gone out the window. Scientific research and climate change knowledge is also being cut – 90 jobs gone at NIWA, 270 jobs gone at Conservation. Some of the dumbest people in politics are dumbing down the country."

        Gordon Campbell in Scoop.

 

Yes, conflicted Willis and weaselly Luxon are systematically gutting our important services and institutions. The changes will have severe repercussions in burning out the front liners in police, health, education and no doubt we'll see more of the best leaving the country.

"Some of the dumbest people in politics are dumbing down the country."

And I'll finish with another Emmerson cartoon where he nails it again.

 

ADDRESSING THE ISSUE

 Richard has been putting up images of guys in skirts on his last two posts:

Maybe this is a response to Robert's transgender and cross-dressing posts.

He should use this store video camera shot of him shopping at the Wainuiomata Countdown:

SATURDAY MORNING

 It's a lovely day today - cool at 15 degrees but bluE-skied with sun.

I went for a gentle stroll around the bay. This is the flat bit with no hill or bush tracks. I'll be doing some digging and paving stone laying today so thought I'd take it easy on the walk.

I stopped at the Settler's church at the end of our road and peeked in the window.

I couldn't see any sign of god but she might have been out fishing.

After all she's pulling a double shift tomorrow as you can see by the sign:

SOME PRETTY GOOD NEWS

 Thanks to the other blog writers in this community we (the Curmudgeons Inc.ⓒ) have created two new Curmudgeons.

The Lazy Curmudgeon: THE LAZY CURMUDGEON was sponsored by Richard of Richard's Bass Bag. Thanks to that guy - one of my favourites. The cheque is in the mail (or, was it I promise not to come in your mouth or I'll still love you in the morning?).

The Inconstant Curmudgeon: THE INCONSTANT CURMUDGEON was sponsored by Robert of ROB (don't ask) and we'll have to wait and see if thanks is necessary.

Stay tuned folks because, who knows, there could be some great posts to come under these banners.

SCAMMERS, LIARS AND OUTRIGHT BASTARDS!

 No, I'm not talking about the other blog members - I'll save that for another post.

I'm referring to the fact that yesterday two different people turned up at my house with cars and trailers to collect furniture that they had 'bought' on Facebook Marketplace. One woman had driven, towing a horse float, from miles away.

I told the first person that she must have been duped unless she had got the address wrong but when another turned up later it was obvious that this is a shyster who is fleecing them for money and providing a bogus address. The second one said that she thought it was a really good deal! I wish that I'd got more details from her but I had dinner cooking on the stove so didn't have time.

I posted the following on Facebook's Neighbourly after dinner:

WARNING SCAM ARTIST 'SELLING' COUCHES
Twice today I've had innocent and duped people turning up to my house to collect couches that they thought they had bought via Marketplace on Facebook. The B*st*** who 'sold' them the non-existent furniture, for some reason used my street address.
Beware!
I think the price asked (and got in one case) was $350 - "A bargain" one woman said. As the bank fraud people say - "If it sounds too good to be true - it isn't".
I've looked up Marketplace on Facebook to put an alert on but there are so many variants I don't know which one is the right one. Hopefully the duped people can do this and get the P***k stopped.

It's so annoying that prick bastards abuse useful sites like Neighbourly and Marketplace. I would never buy from these myself and certainly would never process a payment before seeing or picking up the goods. They don't have the guarantees that Trade Me have. 

ANAZAC DAY 2024

It's a national day of remembrance naturally, but with me it's always a personal day where I remember my dad and uncles, aunts, grand parents, great uncles and great aunts who served in the two world wars.

Dad served in Greece, Crete, North Africa and Italy from 1939 to 1945 in The Divisional Cavalry operating out of light tanks, bren-carriers and Staghounds.

I used to accompany Dad to Dawn Parades in Wellington - just me as my siblings were too lazy to get out of bed that early.

Keeping an eye out for snipers

This afternoon I'll go to the local club for the 2PM service. It's OK, not as evocative and haunting as the Dawn Parades I remember but there will be a piper and a bugler (not some guy playing a nose trumpet like you saw on Robert's blog).

I'll have a coffee laced with rum and maybe an ANZAC biscuit or two,

Yep, I'll remember them - or some of them.

NEW POST - THE HAPPY CURMUDGEON

 

GOING...GOING ...

NEW POST - THE DARKER CURMUDGEON

 The Darker Curmudgeon has a new post.

It has disturbing content so - proceed with care.

STRANGER THAN FICTION

FANCIES

 The previous post on blogging stats was very successful and I'm really pleased.

The success is not in the number of comments received though as so far there have only been four. No, I measure success in the joy I brought to one old blogger who was chuffed to be congratulated on his blogging frequency and to  have been awarded a bronze medal.

You're welcome old blogging guy, enjoy!

If you can bring a little bit of joy to an elderly person from time to time then there's a place in heaven for you if such a place existed.

I kind of borrowed and paraphrased that from Robert's 'ROB' blog:

I wonder if he'll put a good word in for me to the Vatican at the next round of saint selection? I'd fancy that.

*****************

Moving on but talking about fancy - here's a photo taken in Whangarei Heads yesterday (not by me) of a poseur (not me):

We have lots of interesting birdlife here and it's always a treat to see them.

Here's another poseur, this one from the 1970s:

I didn't dress like this myself, preferring the denim and cowboy shirt look but I do remember that Richard sported red velvet trousers and a vinyl jacket at uni. Maybe he still has duds like these that he wants to tell us about?

IT'S STATS TIME OF YEAR

The big news in the blog community is that Robert has changed the theme and layout of his blog!

Not only that but the observant reader will notice that the name he uses has been shortened by about fifteen descriptors to read just 'ROB'. This is a significant improvement.

In the new layout Rob, sorry, Robert has included an archive list. This is right up there with advancements like Princess phones in the 1960s, Ford having other car colour choices in the 1940s and The Gear Meat Company moving out of Petone in the 1980s. This archive list is very telling and shows that Robert has increased the frequency of posting exponentially over the last 23 months. Anyone brave enough to access his blog will also notice that his posts are longer and more detailed and are accompanied by pictures that sometimes have relevance to the content.

The archive shows a total of 488 posts since June 2022 an average of 21 posts a month!

As a comparison The Curmudgeon's blog archive shows 993 posts during the same period - an average of 43 posts per month.

Richard's Bass Bag archive is hard to read due to, I suspect, the deliberate use of unreadable colours in the numbers to obfuscate the results - kind of like how a Mafioso accountant might cook the books.

I think that the average is about 12 posts a month but we'll be generous and say it's 15 making the total over 23 months 345 posts. This is still a notable achievement for one of advanced years who still has difficulties in mastering the reading, writing and posting functions on his phone and computer so a round of applause for him is appropriate:

Well done that man!

NEW POST - THE MUSIC CURMUDGEON

 

DIAMOND IN THE SMOOTH

BLOG ROUNDUP

 It's a nice day today after a couple of days of rain so I'll head out soon for a walk.

Before that I thought I'd give you a quick overview of what's happening on the blogs.

Richard hasn't blogged for a couple of days which isn't a bad thing but it does decrease the community's output stats. He's away at a wedding in the Wairarapa which provides him with the opportunity to use his really worn-out joke about Gilson brandy that Robbie Gosney did to death at Murray Roberts back in the mid 1970s.

This one obviously not bottled in the 'Wairarapa'.

Richard no doubt would have got into a fight with the bridegroom who's a Neil Diamond fan.

Still, it will have made his violin performance and the wedding memorable.

Robert has  changed his blog format to 'ROB' and  seems to be a selection of his best blog posts that have received the most comments - sort of like a greatest hits album.

No doubt this album takes pride of place in his LP selection alongside The Ministers Quartet.

My previous post received no comments but then I wasn't expecting any, not with Richard being away and Robert being in a snit. This afternoon I might write something serious that's worthy of comment.

A SATURDAY UPDATE - FUNNY!

 I don't know what the weather is like where you (readers) are but up here it's raining. It's been raining all night. I know this because I was awake most of the night.

I went to bed about 11PM and might have dozed for a while but by 1AM (no, not a reference to Colin McCahon - you can find him on the Cultured Curmudgeon or the Religious Curmudgeon blog) I was fully awake. This wasn't a good thing as I had chills and slight fever alternating between being too hot or too cold and putting on or removing the duvet cover and extra blanket I put on the bed.

Yesterday I had a double vaccination - Flu and Covid and I must be suffering from some side effects. Doctor Google tells me that this is not unusual, particularly with the Flu shot and the symptoms I'm experiencing are within normal parameters. I'm dining with my GP sister tonight so will check it out with her.

I read and surfed the internet throughout the night which led me to Robert's blog. He posted, quite early sometime after 3AM, a christian nonsense post about all or nearly all of the disciples abandoning Jesus because of one of his latest teachings.
I'm not sure because Robert deleted the post a couple of hours later (I'll explain later) but I think his post was all about John's Gospel 6:60-69 which must be this weekends propaganda message.

Gospel, John 6:60-69

60 After hearing it, many of his followers said, 'This is intolerable language. How could anyone accept it?'

61 Jesus was aware that his followers were complaining about it and said, 'Does this disturb you?

62 What if you should see the Son of man ascend to where he was before?

63 'It is the spirit that gives life, the flesh has nothing to offer. The words I have spoken to you are spirit and they are life.

64 'But there are some of you who do not believe.' For Jesus knew from the outset who did not believe and who was to betray him.

65 He went on, 'This is why I told you that no one could come to me except by the gift of the Father.'

66 After this, many of his disciples went away and accompanied him no more.

67 Then Jesus said to the Twelve, 'What about you, do you want to go away too?'

68 Simon Peter answered, 'Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the message of eternal life,

69 and we believe; we have come to know that you are the Holy One of God.'Gospel, John 6:60-69

I'm not sure what that was all about but it seems that old Jesus got ahead of himself in thinking that his convoluted logic and fairy tales would go well with his followers (disciples). That of course wouldn't happen until many centuries later when the Catholic Church became a bit more proficient in brainwashing and was more readily able to dupe the 'faithful'. At the time most, except for a hard core of nutters (apostles) most of the Jewish followers had a bit more common sense and used it along with their feet.

I posted a comment in reply, a little in keeping with what I said just then and, blow me down, Robert then deleted the post including my comment.

As I said, I wasn't sleeping so strolled through Richard's blog (it didn't get me to sleep strange enough) and checked my recent few posts where I knew that Robert had posted comments. He had removed them! 

Funny I thought. Robert said in an earlier comment:

 "I never delete comments but sometimes delete entire posts".

 

"Funny you should say that".

SEEING AS RICHARD USES OLD JOKES ...

 ...

I BEG TO DISAGREE

"The blogs have been a bit boring lately. Let's face it, cleaning a shed is just not that interesting."

Said Richard* on his latest post.

Well I disagree and found this for him on YouTube:

* The guy who thinks that a post title 'Boar Ring' followed by a picture of a ring in the image of a boar is a clever pun.

NEW POST - THE FOOD CURMUDGEON

 

CHILLI

TAKING A LEAF OUT OF ROBERT'S BOOK ....

 ... well, not lingering in teenage girl's bedrooms obviously (although I notice that he's taken down that particular post), but I have been doing a lot of cleaning and rubbish removal over the last couple of days.

I took another trailer load of rubbish to the tip yesterday which has been a (trailer) load off my mind. This has freed up a lot of space in the shed which will please The Old Girl who takes too much interest in MY shed. Maybe I've done the wrong thing and she'll now appropriate some of the space.

I also cleaned out the bathroom cupboards and the laundry ones which are now much tidier than before. I should have taken 'before' photos to show you...

.. although the third shelf down in the top photo is untouched. "Don't mess around with my stuff Matey!" she said when I was talking on FaceTime to her this morning and told her of my plans.

I'm happy with the result though. In the laundry cupboard I've got some tools and practical household essentials 'on hand' so as not to have to go down to the basement where the bulk of the tools are stored. I tend to get this into a mess though so this time made an effort and got rid of non-essentials.

The more observant reader will notice that no glove puppets were involved in the making of this post not like that deranged fellow down south.

I must admit however to owning one puppet - a 'puppet on a spring' (you can imagine the song referenced) but it keeps to itself in a corner of the snooker room.

A FOOL FOR CHRIST'S SAKE

 

I've always hated hand puppets. From the early days of TV we've been subjected to low-brow humour and unskilled manipulations of silly glove puppets like Sooty (and Sweep). Lamb Chop, Mr Punch, Basil Brush and a host of other childish anthropomorphisms.

There's something deeply disturbing about an adult with his or her hand up a stupid character that 'voices' his or her observations, peeves, objectionable opinions and wants and desires. I can do without that thank you.

Recently Richard (of RBB) has created an alter ego he refers to as a pet and is busy playing with himself - or Ruby the pet and has made some video recordings. These are right up there (or down there) with those I mentioned which probably suggests that they would be successful with people of diminished comedic critical abilities - aka the general public.  He's already got one follower who fits that criteria:

Do you want to see what the silly old bugger's up to?  See: RUBY