I'm a bit of an inventor. Which bit I'm not sure but I've come up with some pretty neat ideas.
The Old Girl doesn't have a lot of confidence in them though. She usually falls about laughing when I tell her about them. That's a bit deflating really and maybe is the reason that I don't take these inventions to the patent office.
An example was:
The boiler suit wardrobe.
Choosing clothes to wear is such a hassle. My idea is for everyone to just have a half dozen boiler suits (zip up overalls) each with a pattern to suit whatever the day demands. One with a suit and tie pattern for office work, special occasions and funerals. One with a Hawaiian shirt motif at the top and shorts for leisure and BBQs. One with an open neck shirt and chinos design for casual wear - you get the picture?
Anyway, I've got a new one.
I've noticed that drivers in Toronto beep their car horn incessantly. This makes for a confusing cacophony of noise on the streets.
My idea is for the government to make it compulsory for all vehicles to have a special horn mechanism fitted (my patented design of course) that has three different and distinct tones:
1. The Warning Tone - to say "Look out. Danger. Take care"
2. Greeting Tone - to say "Hi. How's it going. See you later"
3. Angry Tone - to say "Fuck off. You tosser. I'm going to punch your lights out you wanker"
Each steering wheel will have three colour coded buttons at the top to press when needed. The Angry Tone will be red of course.
What do you think?
2 comments:
I sort of live the boiler suit dream. I wear the same clothes every day.
The three horn idea could work.
Oh, yes. At the very least a two horn system. A friendly ' the light is green now' sort, and a firmer 'you were supposed to give way to me, you bleeping idiot' one.
Post a Comment