BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU JOKE ABOUT

A while ago I wrote a post about Port and joked that I might be old and fat but I didn't have gout

SEE HERE

Well the last couple of days I've been almost crippled by pains in my right foot, suspiciously at the base of my big toe.

Gout (also known as podagra when it involves the big toe)^[1] is a medical condition usually characterized by recurrent attacks of acuteinflammatory arthritis—a red, tender, hot, swollen joint. The metatarsal-phalangeal joint at the base of the big toe is the most commonly affected (approximately 50% of cases). However, it may also present as tophi, kidney stones, or urate nephropathy. It is caused by elevated levels of uric acid in the blood which crystallizes and the crystals are deposited in joints, tendons, and surrounding tissues.

A clinical diagnosis is confirmed by the visualization of the characteristic crystals in joint fluid. Treatment with nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drugs (NSAIDs), steroids, or colchicine improves symptoms. Once the acute attack has subsided, levels of uric acid are usually lowered via lifestyle changes, and in those with frequent attacks allopurinol or probenecid provide long-term prevention.
Gout has increased in frequency in recent decades affecting approximately one to two percent of the Western population at some point in their lives. The increase is believed to be due to increasing risk factors in the population, such as metabolic syndrome, longer life expectancy and changes in diet. Gout was historically known as "the disease of kings" or "rich man's disease".

This is bloody painful and makes normal walking difficult. It is one of those conditions that don't bring sympathy when mentioned. It in fact generally elicits howls of laughter and derision. Why is that? When one mentions the possibility of gout the listener conjures up images of a fat and debauched Henry VIII. Hey! I hardly ever drink Port, eat very little red meat, never eat shell-sfish and run a mile at the thought of eating offal so why me?