RICHARD'S BASS BAG TOURS is to touring like William McGonagall is to poetry, Margarita Pracatan is to music or Judith Collins is to politics.
Initially we were to take a ferry to Somes Island now known again as Matiu but this would have meant a more than 2 hour wait for the ferry at Queens Wharf and, it was getting a bit chilly.
Richard suggested one of his famous tours by car to which I quickly suggested a drive to Owhiro Bay and then a walk to Red Rocks.
Instead of undertaking this though we visited the Portrait Museum on Queen's Wharf and saw the excellent Marti Friedlander exhibition and watched the documentary Marti Friedlander-The Passionate Eye which was excellent and well worth seeking out. This gives her view of New Zealand arts and social scene through her photographs capturing New Zealand artists and writers of the 1960s and 1970s many of whom are now dead. She also chronicled Maori women with images reminiscent of C.F. Goldie.
After this we took a bus to where Richard had parked his car. Yes, we took a bus. Richard's idea of parking is to put the car as far as possible away from where he plans to go. This would make sense if he was looking for free parking but no, it was paid parking at the same cost as if he had parked outside Queen's Wharf.
"Where to?" I asked and just as he was about to suggest his tour I quickly chimed in "I'd like to go to Days Bay". We set off to Days Bay and, for some strange reason Richard thought the way to there was via the Mount Victoria Tunnel. This was, remember, RICHARD'S BASS BAG TOURS.
Just before the tunnel I spied a wine and spirit store I'd like to visit so Richard parked there. He said that he also wanted to go in as he might know, or, know of someone there. I selected a few over-priced bottles and just as I put them on the counter to purchase them Richard asked the counter-guy if the 'someone he may or may not know' was there. This guy apparently is the ex flatmate of Richard's daughter.
"Oh no" I thought, "this counter-guy will think that Richard is name dropping to get us a discount and he'll end up overcharging us."
The counter-guy said that Richard's possible acquaintance didn't work there on Tuesdays and ...... he significantly overcharged me. I thought the cost of $175 was a bit high but it wasn't until we'd get in the car that I checked the receipt and yes, there was a $15 overcharge. I went back in and got a refund. The counter-guy blamed the bar codes but I blame Richard.
We headed off again, this time not towards the tunnel back out to the Hutt Valley. A mercifully short tour of Petone, Moera, Wainuiomata and some other 'highlights' of the famous RICHARD'S BASS BAG TOUR miraculously morphed into a run out to Days Bay which was delightful. We had lunch there - RICHARD'S BASS BAG TOURS is all-inclusive - before going back to the city where Richard dropped me off at home.
Thanks for a great day Richard.
2 comments:
Well, at least it postponed the next train post. People will feel a little safer in their backyards.
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