THE CHRISTMAS MANGER

While waiting (interminably) for Richard's Christmas Special that he's threatened promised to deliver on one or all of his three 'Bass Bag' blogs, I thought that I'd do another post on the 'Christmas Origins' theme.

I've done these before as you may remember:



CHRISTMAS LETTERS


CHRISTMAS CRACKERS


CHRISTMAS TREES


CHRISTMAS CARDS


CHRISTMAS PRESENTS


CHRISTMAS LIGHTS


This time an explanation of the origin of the Christmas Manger is due for discussion.

In the Gospel of Luke an angel is described as announcing the birth of Jesus to shepherds who visited and found Jesus lying in a manger which is a trough for cattle feed. He was said to be surrounded by Mary, Joseph and some farm animals.
Luke then recounts how some wise men followed a star to the house and also found Jesus in the cattle trough with Mary and Joseph standing beside it..

Now this isn't likely to be true.
Jesus wasn't born a peasant what with him being the son of god and all and was probably fabulously wealthy so that old nativity scene as first mentioned by Luke and later embellished by Francis of Assisi was a bit of codswallop. Mary for sure would have preferred to stay in the 'big house' with her beau.

Mary's 'beau' of course wasn't poor old Joseph. As you will remember Joseph, Mary's husband was cuckolded by The archangel Gabriel who knocked her up on god's instructions and they both made out to Joseph that Mary miraculously conceived the son of god. Joseph sort of went along with this but most likely wasn't convinced.

The manger story and image as first mentioned by Luke in his gospel and later recreated by St Francis is more likely to have started from the shepherds and then the wise men arriving to find Joseph sleeping out there. Joseph probably was taking his turn to look after the baby Jesus as Mary was obviously otherwise engaged. If Luke had actually been there and saw Joseph sleeping in the trough with Jesus beside him it's unlikely, out of embarrassment that he would have gone into the 'big house' to see where Mary was and instead scribbled out the bucolic scene that we are now all used to.

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CHRISTMAS IS COMING THOUGH

The phutakawas at the front of our place are announcing it.

YOU BETTER WATCH OUT

SMOKEY'S VERSION

"You better watch out

You better not cry

Better not pout

I'm telling you why

Santa Claus is coming to town"

Yes, it's December 1st today and Christmas - that pagan festival that christians appropriated some time ago and then built a myth around it to draw in millions of gullible donors - will soon be on top of us.

Why the warning you might ask? Well, in addition to being bombarded by gift offers, commercial well-wishing from service providers and diabolically awful seasonal music in shopping malls, we are soon going to have Richard's Bass Bag Christmas Letter inflicted on us.

Oh joy!

To make it worse as Richard's Bass Bag is having its biennial schism with the resurgence of Richard's Bass Bag 2 we will most likely get two or even more Christmas Letters.

You have been warned.

THE KING IS DEAD* - LONG LIVE THE KING

* Well, not dead - more like abdicated.

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Robert, although not known for his observational abilities (he believes in Creationism and thinks that the earth is flat) noticed that Richard's Bass Bag was defunct and, like a flea abandoning a dead dog decided to stop reading and commenting on Richard's Bass Bag blog and to use Richard's Bass Bag 2 instead.

In apparent proof of the demise of Richard's Bass Bag, Richard himself admitted that Richard's Bass Bag 2 was taking over and began actively soliciting readership.

FIRST PROOF

SECOND PROOF

Robert, when challenged about the support or otherwise he gets from his wife for his blogging said -

"My wife likes me blogging about anything except religion... and of course not offending people!"

Which is a convoluted way of saying that she doesn't like him blogging at all since he only ever blogs about religion and he invariably offends people.

What a funny old world this blogging is.

Here's wishing well to Richard's Bass Bag 2  and R.I.P. 

Richard's Bass Bag .

FREQUENCY

As you get older frequency in most things diminishes except for perhaps urination, especially during the night.

In the area of blogging I'm guilty of not doing many posts recently. Apart from being a bit lazy at present one of the main reasons is that The Old Girl has been spending a lot of time up here instead of in Auckland to keep an eye on me. As she has been working from home she occupies the study most days which is where the iMac lives on which I do my blogging. I check and read blogs on my iPad but it's too much of a fankle to write posts on this and often it won't allow me to comment on others posts.


When I use the iMac in the study I'm conscious of her looking sideways at me wondering what I'm doing.

I remember Twisted Scottish Bastard, that irreverent and amusing blogger (now seemingly retired) mentioning something similar about his wife's circumspection of his blogging and internet proclivities:

MACHINE OF THE DEVIL

I'm not sure how Robert gets on with his wife watching. Maybe he blogs at work while hiding in his cupboard. He is after all, as he says, unchallenged by any use of his brain when at work. The unkind might say though that he is unchallenged by the use of his brain while blogging as well.

Richard seems to have slipped a bit in his blogging to the point where robert now only reads one of his alternate blogs Richard's Bass Bag The Second or something. Good luck with that I say.

NOT EXACTLY WORTHY OF NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC

There was a pod of orca in our bay on saturday but I didn't see them unfortunately otherwise I'd have taken the kayak out.

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When I was in Auckland last week I bought a compact flash card converter that enabled me to download photographs from the memory card from Canon G5 camera that got ruined a few years ago. See:    EVERY PICTURE TELLS A STORY

They weren't the great shots I was hoping for with the mother dolphin and her pup seeming to dive underwater everytime I steadied myself on the kayak to take a snap. This is the best I captured showing their fins:

It was just after this that she came up beside my kayak, slapped her tail on the water and drenched me and my camera.

TIME FOR A NEW ANTHEM

While watching the All Blacks play Ireland last weekend and listening to the godawful national anthem which is only marginally made better by the Maori translation, I wondered why, in 2018 we still adopt this dirge with its unfashionable, irrelevant and nonsensical attribution to a god or a mythical being that doesn't exist.

"God Defend New Zealand"

God of Nations at Thy feet,
In the bonds of love we meet,
Hear our voices, we entreat,
God defend our free land.
Guard Pacific's triple star
From the shafts of strife and war,
Make her praises heard afar,
God defend New Zealand.
Men of every creed and race,
Gather here before Thy face,
Asking Thee to bless this place,
God defend our free land.
From dissension, envy, hate,
And corruption guard our state,
Make our country good and great,
God defend New Zealand.
Peace, not war, shall be our boast,
But, should foes assail our coast,
Make us then a mighty host,
God defend our free land.
Lord of battles in Thy might,
Put our enemies to flight,
Let our cause be just and right,
God defend New Zealand.
Let our love for Thee increase,
May Thy blessings never cease,
Give us plenty, give us peace,
God defend our free land.
From dishonour and from shame,
Guard our country's spotless name,
Crown her with immortal fame,
God defend New Zealand.
May our mountains ever be
Freedom's ramparts on the sea,
Make us faithful unto Thee,
God defend our free land.
Guide her in the nations' van,
Preaching love and truth to man,
Working out Thy glorious plan,

"God Defend New Zealand"

 Well what a lot of nonsense that is. Initially written as a poem in the 1870s by Thomas Bracken who strangely enough was an Irishman. Maybe he was having a laugh.

The words are trite and the sentiment is craven - things that we as a nation should be avoiding.

Why on earth we still have this is anyone's guess. Tradition I suppose and an unwillingness to change as evidenced by the failure of the flag change a couple of years ago. This of course was doomed to failure because that smarmy bastard John Key was using it as a kind of swansong legacy for himself so most people chose not to let him get his way. I still believe that the crappy flag has to be changed though. Changing of the anthem is even more essential.

The dirge-like music for our anthem was written by a bloody Australian who was definitely having a laugh. His name was Joseph Woods and apparently he knocked off the tune one evening, probably while playing with himself in the bath going "Da da da dee, dum diddly dee".

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Now New Zealand isn't the only silly country that has mention of god in its anthem - not by a long shot.

This map shows the other countries that do the same:

It's interesting to see that our cousins in Australia have had the good sense not to.

I wonder if Robert has an opinion on this?

HEAVEN

HEAVEN

Everyone is trying

To get to the bar

The name of the bar

The bar is called heaven

The band in heaven

They play my favorite song

Play it one more time

Play it all night long

Heaven

Heaven is a place

A place where nothing

Nothing ever happens

Heaven

Heaven is a place

A place where nothing

Nothing ever happens

There is a party

Everyone is there

Everyone will leave

At exactly the same time

It's hard to imagine that

Nothing at all

Could be so exciting

Could be this much fun

Heaven

Heaven is a place

A place where nothing

Nothing ever happens

Heaven

Heaven is a place

A place where nothing

Nothing ever happens

When this kiss is over

It will start again

It will not be any different

It will be exactly the same

It's hard to imagine

That nothing at all

Could be so exciting

Could be this much fun

Heaven

Heaven is a place

A place where nothing

Nothing ever happens

Heaven

Heaven is a place

A place where nothing

Nothing ever happens

Songwriters: David Byrne / Jerry Harrison

Heaven lyrics © Warner/Chappell Music, Inc


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Richard and Robert are arguing again on their respective blogs about christianity and the fatuous beliefs that Robert holds. Insane, inane, asinine and nonsensical things like: creationism; Adam and Eve propagating the world only 10,000 years ago; Noah repopulating it after a flood which wiped out everyone only 4,500 years ago; the existence of heaven, hell and angels etc.

This got me thinking about what I think is heaven. When I used to work, doing things I really didn't want to do for people who I didn't really like I used to fantasise about having the opportunity to just do what I want to do, whenever I want to do it. The opportunity to sit and read a book, doze in the sun, listen to National Radio etc. Now I can do these things - without guilt and without feeling pressured into 'doing something useful'.

Of course I do get out and about doing gardening, going walking, kayaking and playing some sports which balances out the 'lazing' but at the moment I feel fatigued and spend more time thinking than doing. Soon I will get back some energy and will, when I'm able to drive again, go to the gym and to tennis or golf but at present 'heaven' for me is " a place. A place where nothing. Nothing ever happens"

Sorry Robert.

NEW POST - THE MUSIC CURMUDGEON

The Music Curmudgeon went to a concert on Saturday night and really liked it.

See HERE

00Z - LICENCE TO SLEEP

I've always been a bit dozy and at school and work I was known as 'Mr Sleepy'

See HERE


Now, following the stroke I had a couple of weeks ago I'm feeling sleepy in the afternoons.

The good news is that this is expected

Fatigue after stroke.

 "Everyone feels tired sometimes. This is a normal part of life and it happens for all sorts of reasons such as not sleeping well or being very busy all day. Usually people feel much better after resting or sleeping. Fatigue after stroke is different; you may feel constantly weary, tired and lacking energy or strength. These feelings and symptoms are present even after a rest or sleep. The cause of fatigue after stroke is not clear even though it affects about 50% of people living with stroke. It may be a combination of damage to the brain and the stress and effort associated with adjusting to a new life situation. After stroke almost all activities including walking and talking require extra energy and attention. Brain function may be less ‘efficient’ than before."                       

 - Stroke Foundation of New Zealand 

Basically I have a 'licence' to have a little nap from time to time without feeling any guilt about it.

Now I'm not recommending having a stroke as you might not be as fortunate as I've been so far but it is kind of nice to be allowed to have a doze from time to time.
I've done housework this morning and this afternoon mowed the lawns so am looking forward to a few zzzz s now.

Oidhche mhath!