When men use the TV remote they tend to skilfully navigate their way through at least 20 channels, remembering the salient points of each programme that they notice on the way through. They do a quick re-look at channels that, as they were speeding through, showed an enticing flash of female breast, thigh or bum and similarly when there is a snatch (unrelated to the previous phrase - ed.) of war, western or action film. Having quickly scanned all potential channels they can then decide on 3 or 4 to flick between and have an evenings entertainment.
When a woman gets hold of the remote she invariably clicks on channel 1 and 2 and then jumps to at least 18 and if there is a house renovation programme showing, stops there. If there is no house renovation programme or a relocation programme she will jump to channels 20 and 21 the Sky movie channels. If there is a chick-flick, a ROM or a dance movie then that's where she stays. Amazingly it makes no difference if the movie has just started, is halfway through or is near the end - this is where she stays.
The man grits his teeth, sighs heavily but goes unnoticed. He then resorts to leaving the room and reading and writing blog posts.
3 comments:
What a pity you missed James Bond last night.
Bin Hire
word verifcation was '007'
- no not really, just an old Arab verification joke!
Curmudgeon,
Seriously you need to let your lady be in charge of the remote more often. Living out in the country, as you do, there must be a bit of need for DIY.
Instead of blogging all the time you could add on a patio or a conservatory.
Also there is a lot to be learned from what you call 'shic flicks'. Have you ever considered that the good lady might be drawing you towards these films because she wants you yo be more romantic, like the male lead. Or maybe she is telling you that losing a few pounds wouldn't be a waste of time. You must really try to be more intuitive. I could give this same advice to your friend Rich, but he's up to his neck with bass problems right now. I'll let him try to sort out those first.
Dave Shaw
ps. Why does he call you 'Comeinyourpants'?
No no no.The solution is a hard drive, 14" tv and head phones. Record your favourite channel all day ( probably Fashion in Curmudgeeons case) then sit back and enjoy all evening while she whatches what ever...
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