THE CURMUDGEONS INC. MEETING APRIL 2018

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Welcome all of THE CURMUDGEONS INC.ⓒ and associates. Thanks for coming.

The Mundane Curmudgeon has done an attendance check and we have here:

The Curmudgeon (me, ha ha)
The Curmudgeon Express
The Religious Curmudgeon
The Darker Curmudgeon
The Curmudgeon's Agony Aunt
The Food Curmudgeon
The Philosophical Curmudgeon
The Curmudgeonly Luddite
The Cultured Curmudgeon
The Music Curmudgeon
The Twitter Curmudgeon
The Wine Guy
The Wine Guy (New)
The Wine Guy Express
Bas's Bag
Good Kiwi Bloke
Zweite Geige

and of course The Mundane Curmudgeon (ha ha).

This is a big meeting and The Mundane Curmudgeon has had a lot to do to get it underway but then, that's why he's The Mundane Curmudgeon I guess. On my recommendation he approached Richard's Bass Bagg (and its offshoots) and Robert to see if they could assist in the organising and to, of course attend the after-meeting piss-up wine tasting set up by The Wine Guy. There was no response from Richard (of RBB) but this might be because it's his wedding anniversary this weekend (either that or Shelley finally strangled him with a bass string). Richard's alter-egos seem to have ceased to be involved in the blogging community. Robert said that he'd like to give a hand but he has both hands occupied. Never mind, The Mundane Curmudgeon has it all sorted.

Now you'll notice that The Old Girl isn't here. I just drove her in to the airport for her flight to Auckland. Well, actually she drove as she wanted to try out the 'new' car and I drove home. As per usual she treated the Corolla like a rally car, testing it on corners with rapid gear changes, braking and acceleration and on the flat straights with full-on power. Frankly I was pleased to arrive in one piece but she is a good driver. I was a bit concerned though as she has hardly driven over the last 5 years and it is definitely 5 years since she drove a manual gear change car.

She is however now in Auckland so (coincidentally) we can have the meeting (thanks The Mundane Curmudgeon for keeping things schtum).

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.............. (General business was discussed with some competitor analysis reported on. Points to note were the disappearance of Richard's Bass Bagg cohorts ( who may be sulking since the collapse of the Confederacy) and the ultimate failure (despite some promising signs) of Robert's blog in terms of coherency, consistency and durability.)

To conclude

The Curmudgeon: 

Right guys. As you know I have a lot of commitments on at present having sold our apartment and bought another, the paperwork, banking details and physical shift all has to happen before or on the 24th of this month. 

Zweite Geige:

Anzac Day is the day after on the 25th .....

The Curmudgeon: 

(through gritted teeth) Yes thanks for that ZG  (you little bastard Nazi) I know that and that's why the settlement day is being brought forward so that all good Kiwis can celebrate New Zealand's victories over the last two centuries ....

Zweite Geige:  

Hey, what are you implying you ....

The Curmudgeon:

How many World wars have you lot won then? ..

Zweite Geige:

Schweinhund!  I've been working hard to help my adopted country no matter how backward all you peasants are. I've ......

The Darker Curmudgeon:

Sit down you little cunt or I'll plant you ...

The Mundane Curmudgeon:

Ha ha ... guys....guys.... settle down OK

The Curmudgeon: 

Hey The Mundane Curmudgeon, let them have a go at each other. Look, it's been me (and the Religious and The Food Curmudgeons) who've been keeping things going recently. The rest of these lazy bastards have just been sitting around with their thumbs up their arses. I reckon....

The Cultured Curmudgeon:

You cunt!

The Philosophical Curmudgeon:

I say, The Cultured Curmudgeon, that's a bit strong isn't it?

The Curmudgeon's Agony Aunt:

You can fuck off too The Philosophical Curmudgeon, I'm sick of your trite observations and it's just as well that you haven't posted for a while. Enjoy that thumb up your arse did you? (sorry Robert).

General hubbub, shouting, fighting, bottles breaking etc

The Curmudgeon: 

Guys, guys , cut it out. The Wine Guy put on some great wines tonight (that he got free from sponsors). Settle down.

If you don't you can all fuck off as my pizza (home -made pepperoni) is nearly ready. This Villa Maria Cellar Selection Pinot Noir is pretty good - thanks The Wine Guy.

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MEETING ENDED AT 6:19 PM