4 November 2017
CURMUDGEONS INC.ⓒ
Mr Bas
BAS's BASS BAG
In the matter of your request for incorporation with CURMUDGEONS INC.
Our commercial section along with our IT department have investigated your blog and your situation and we have the following to report:
We regret that we are unable to offer you a merger opportunity at this time nor will we consider an outright purchase of the intellectual properties in your blog domain known as BAS's BASS BAG.
CURMUDGEONS INC.ⓒ has spent considerable time, energy and expense in building up a thriving and viable enterprise based in the northern part of this country where we consider the greatest opportunities exist. Our readership demands quality in erudition, culture, ethics and professionalism and, while not wishing to slate that southernmost-but-one North Island city we do not see that an association with it will be of benefit to us.
We wish you well with your endeavours however and in the spirit of good relations we enclose with this letter a CURMUDGEONS INC.ⓒ T-shirt and a CURMUDGEONS INC.ⓒ cap for you to wear
provided that you dress yourself in some form of lower garment. Shorts or trousers preferred. We trust that in good faith you will not wear any such lower garment that carries one of or competitors branding.
Yours etc.
The Commercial Manager.
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2 comments:
Dear Mr Winston sorry I mean Robert.
I note from your name that you may be a gentleman of foreign extraction.
While we at CURMUDGEONS INC. make every effort to be internationally minded with open views on race, religion, culture, ethnicity, religion, education and breeding, it's our readers opinions that we must respect.
We have reviewed your application and, unfortunately, have rejected your request for an ongoing association and financial assistance. Don't get us wrong Mr Winston sorry I mean Robert, it is certainly not your connection to an arcane religion of white men that has brought us to this conclusion, nor is it an enticing offer of a readership of violin players and listeners. No. The crunch for us was the threat of snare drum players.
Without that you could have certainly been our Minister of Foreign Affairs (the foreigner the better).
Yours etc.
Commercial Manager.
Well stuff you then. I'll take my business to another bloody blog.
I hear that there's some pretty good ones around here. I've tried my old mate's Robert's one and when he gets back on line I'm sure he'll get in touch.
He said that he has family connections to the best blogger in Wellington or I think that's what he said - could have meant the bluest Bugger - he doesn't spell that well- never-mind, thanks for nothing.
PS. Thanks for the t-shirt and hat.
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