THE ALTERNATIVE NEW YEAR HONOUR AWARDS.

 We note that Richard has awarded himself top honours in his own New Year Honours Awards.

Nothing new there.  I'm not sure what he awarded himself but here's a suggestion that would suit him figuratively and literally.

I'VE PLUMBED THE DEPTHS NOW .....

 .....with this story.

The plumber has been and fixed the leaks. New connections have been put on to replace the problem ones.

The area under the house at the point of the leaks is very cramped and accessing and fixing things wasn't easy.

I set up some lights which was helpful because it's pretty dark under there.

All done now. Fingers crossed!

So, how's your day been?

"GOING DOWN?"

 This unofficial series of posts on the plumbing problem is proving to be very popular. Richard has responded in comments and several posts on his own blog as he is obviously fascinated by them.

here is his latest post: RICHARD'S LATEST POST in which he fantasises me having the ability to travel down the sewer pipes.

TRAINSPOTTING - TOILET

That of course was a scene from the excellent film Trainspotting in all its disgusting glory.

Fortunately our water problems are fresh water leaking not 'brown' water.

The plumber hasn't been yet but he did say that he had a big job (pun) on elsewhere today and would hopefully get to ours later.

WORK STILL IN PROGRESS.

 If I'd known how popular the posts on our plumbing would be I'd have written a series of  UNDER THE HOUSE earlier.

The plumber arrived yesterday morning which was pretty good for a Sunday in the middle of the Christmas period. He fixed the problem leak by cutting out a couple of sections and installing new piping. The old piping is Polybutylene  which was in use in the seventies and eighties. Nowadays it is banned for new installations.

As the plumber was finishing up, the water pressure blew out another old section of pipe. This is even further under the hose at an even narrower point. To reach it requires laying on your back with your face close to the floorboards like in this self pic I took last year.

Unfortunately the plumber didn't have the required replacement materials in his van and the supply shops were closed yesterday and today. He will pick up the necessary bits and pieces tomorrow and finish the job. I'm going to book him in to replace all of the Polybutylene. I don't want to go through this again.

WORK IN PROGRESS

 

Enough said.

DONE IT

 I've been looking to buy a cordless lawnmower for some time and have compared, online, EGO, Greenworks, Ryobi, Stihl and other brands. The price vs power and reliability factor favoured EGO which, as expected was the second most expensive brand (after Stihl).

I waited for the Black Friday sales in November but EGO wasn't discounted. Today, EGO at Mitre 10 also wasn't discounted but there was a bundling deal that I took advantage of. EGO are offering a free extra  battery (value a couple of hundred dollars) for all purchases over $800. In addition, Mitre 10 offered $15 vouchers for every $100 spend today. I managed to get $135 worth of vouchers. This along with the free extra battery makes the deal attractive so I bought the push 16.5 inch Deck  56 Volt 5AH Battery model.

I'll wait for the lawn to dry out before giving it a try out. 

I'll also have to, unfortunately, climb under the house to check out a possible water leak. 

We had a problem over a year ago and I'm hoping that it isn't something similar see: HERE

Murphy's Law says that these problems will spring up (see what I did there?) at Christmas and other holiday times. As it's a fankle getting right under the house at the lowest points and if there is a leak the ground will be muddy, I bought a pair of disposable overalls from Mitre 10 this morning.

Hopefully it won't be as serious as before.*

* I've just been under the houses and yes it is as serious as before.

The leak once again is in the furthest and narrowest part of the crawl space.

I've rung a plumber who may be able to get the fix done tomorrow. This time I'll ask him for a quote for replacing the entire under house pipes

"STRAIGHT TO THE POOL ROOM"

 The Old Girl and I played a couple of games of pool late this afternoon, the first time since the lockdown periods in March/April this year.

We used to play a 'best of three' every Saturday night so now that she will be up here permanently we can get back to that  with the odd extra day thrown in.

We opened the Rockford Sparkling Shiraz and had a glass each while playing two games and waiting for the roast dinner to cook. Sparkling Shiraz is so rich (and alcoholic) that it's a wine that isn't to be rushed so a glass each easily stretched over two frames of pool. We will have another glass each with dinner.

I like this pool room which is large enough to accommodate a three quarter snooker table and has nice bay windows that look out on views of both Mount Manaia and Mount Aubrey, the two peaks near where we live.

The new lights I put in earlier in the year make a difference. Before we had the original chandelier lights that didn't shine down properly on the table. The new 'down' lights light up the table the way that they do in snooker parlours.

Dinner is just about ready (it's been The Old Girl's turn to cook today - lucky me) so I've got to go.

I trust that you all had a great Christmas day.

NEW POST - THE RELIGIOUS CURMUDGEON

 Richard asked me where my Christmas message was today.

Well, I had a sleep in before doing essential household chores, watched The Old Girl prepare Christmas lunch and the makings of Christmas dinner, wrote a previous blog and now, The Religious Curmudgeon has a birthday message to Jesus and the other demigods out there.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALL YOU GUYS!

BACK IN THE SADDLE

 Yee ha!

The Old Girl is officially on holiday for a week or so and I'm allowed back into the study where I can use my trusty iMac for important computer things.*

I've packed up the laptop and the other stuff from the dining table (yes, it did come under criticism for making the lounge untidy) and am now all set - at least for a couple of weeks.

"You can stay in the study even when I'm working Matey." she said "You'll only have to move when I'm on a conference call."

We'll see how that works out!

Christmas Day up here is overcast and a bit windy - surprisingly not like me as I was circumspect on Christmas Eve and we only shared a bottle of Deutz Rose. She was tired and went to bed early and I watched the last two episodes of The Crown. It's good and we'll have to wait until 2022 for the new series. The inbred idiots get a fair hammering from the writers and that simp Diana, I'm pleased to say, so far hasn't been given that silly reverential treatment.

We are going to have lunch soon - corn fritters and chicken 'bacon' rashers accompanied by a bottle of that excellent Pol Roger Champagne. We might follow that with a pool challenge.

Dinner is in the long process of preparation:

• Potatoes and golden kumara par-boiled ready for roasting.
• Pumpkin cut and ready for roasting
• Large chicken is in crock-pot for initial cooking before roasting.
• Fruit custard flan has been made which will be accompanied by creamy Greek yoghurt.

My input into this?

Nil so far.

This trusty crockpot must be 40 years old and still is better than the modern equivalents.

The Old Girl's fruit and custard flan - delicious

 

Dinner will be accompanied by a bottle of Rockford Sparkling Shiraz

This unique Australian wine style is a must for Christmas dinner as the rich flavours counterbalance any rich food that it is drunk with. It goes well with both savoury and sweet dishes. Yummy.

We used to buy and drink E&E Sparkling Shiraz and Leasingham Sparkling Shiraz years ago but these brands became casualties of the collapse of BRL Hardy after purchase by the American company Constellation. Another example of the stupid takeovers and mergers that decimated the Australian (and in a smaller way the New Zealand) wine industry.

We discovered this in a Wellington restaurant (Noble Rot) and found out where to buy it online.

How's your Christmas day going so far?

* Including blogging

HERE WE GO (PART FOUR).

 "Get me some haloumi Matey" said The Old Girl when I was off to the local superette to buy fresh salad ingredients for tonight's tea.

I hate it when I'm asked to buy things that are outside of the normal ranges I shop within.

Haloumi.

A disgusting cheese related item that only women, to my knowledge, order in restaurants, buy and cook with.

I collected the salad leaves, cherry tomatoes, mandarins and Feta cheese and stood looking in the chiller where i got the Feta from. I looked left, right, up, down and all about and couldn't see the haloumi anywhere.  I was getting desperate and was considering driving on another 15 minutes to Onerahi township where there is a New World store.

A I was standing there another guy came along and he too spent minutes looking at all of the cheeses. "I'm looking for haloumi" he plaintively said "Do you know what that is?". I said I was also looking for it and couldn't see it anywhere. He asked what it was and I told him that it was a kind of cheese thing that tasted like wallpaper paste and had a rubbery texture. We both agreed that the women indoors liked it and that we wouldn't go near it. "I can't go home without it" he said at which time we swapped 'war stories' about  being given hard to find items when shopping like hand creams, certain brands of hair shampoo and other esoteric womens' things. This puts men under tremendous stress and they can be seen wandering along supermarket shelves like lost sheep.

He wandered off and I was planning to finish shopping there and drive to the New World when he returned with a shop assistant. "Here it is" he triumphantly stated after the shop assistant had shown him where the Haloumi was in the chiller.

It was right next to the Feta cheese. It had bright blue packaging. There were about 8 packs. I was flabbergasted that I hadn't seen it before.

But ..... I was even more flabbergasted that the other guy had asked a shop assistant. HE ASKED SOMEONE!

WTF? 

HERE WE GO (PART THREE)

 "I need more drawers Matey" declared The Old Girl, referring to the shared rimu tallboy we have in the bedroom.

She has use of the top four smaller drawers for her stuff and I have the larger four drawers for, in descending order: socks and underwear; T-shirts; shorts; long trousers.

To be fair, she does need extra space having returned from Wellington with suitcases of clothes that all won't fit into her small wardrobe.

I emptied my drawers and set about moving the items to the kauri chest of drawers in the alcove in the bedroom.

This required emptying it of clothing that I will unlikely use like the thermal underwear I had in Canada, some ski clothing, shorts, shirts and trousers I haven't worn for years and other bits and pieces.

In went socks and underwear, some T-shirts, shorts but ..... there wasn't enough room. These drawers are smaller than the rimu ones. Some of my stuff had to go to AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT ROOM!

This dresser is in the study, or what once was my study and is now The Old Girl's office. In it I had stored winter clothing, kayaking stuff, jeans, jumpers and scarves and, some stationery.

I took all of the warmer clothing items out and put in a suitcase for storage. Suitcases for storage is code for stage 1 of getting rid of things. After a suitable quarantine period - like purgatory, the stuff in suitcases will be taken out of the shed and given to Op shops. I put my trousers, pyjamas, 'house pants' and the rest of my shorts and T-shirts in the drawers that I emptied.

This might be temporary though. I already have use of the built in wardrobe in the study office for my clothes that need hanging up but we also have a wardrobe in one of the spare rooms that currently is full of junk but has built in drawers.

I suspect that soon my stuff in the dresser in the office will need to find a new home.  It will have to be in this wardrobe,

Failing that the woodshed beckons.

HERE WE GO. (PART TWO).

 The paintings.

"Where's the Sinclair painting I like" asked The Old Girl.

After a bit of a hunt around I remembered where I had put it - in a little alcove in the bedroom above the chest of drawers*.

"What's it doing there?" she asked "I like it in front of the wood burner in the lounge."

"But I had to move it when the fireplace repair people came" I replied.

"OK, but I want it back" she said.

It's back

"What will I put in the alcove now" I asked plaintively.

She looked around and said "What about your tui?"

The tui painting in question has been sitting on top of the record player that we never use. I like this little painting by a local artist but The Old Gill isn't that fussed on it.

"OK" I said "I'll move it."

This means that the stand on top of the record player is empty.

I'm tempted to put something bizarre on it like one of those bloody cushions she has scattered over the furniture. Not now though, I'll do it later and see how long it takes her to notice it.

Right now I'm going to have a glass of Hawkes Bay rose. A big one!

* The chest of drawers will feature in HERE WE GO (PART THREE).

HERE WE GO. (Part one).

 HERE WE GO. A new series.

The Old Girl is back home now and will be working from home next year.

This, obviously is good news as she will be here with me all of the time ..... but, there may be some adjustments necessary.

Already, after a few days my trusty dish brush has been relegated to a new place.

This brush is very handy for scrubbing pots and pans in hot soapy water.

He can be seen here trying to get in and help.

"Giz a job. I can do that."

He normally lives on the dishrack that I often don't put away or, if I have put it away, in the space at the back of the sink behind the tap.

Now he's been relegated to the cupboard below the sink, the living area of the spare brush and the dreaded toothbrush that The Old Girl and other OCD people use to clean finicky areas.

FLAY YOUR FART

 FLAY YOUR FART

WELL HE IS A FROWSE.

I wouldn't at all be surprised to see Richard or Robert coming up with this and of course wasn't surprised to see that this nutter has the surname Prowse.

Peter Prowse, a retired Surrey PR consultant and translator made  this video suggesting the government is to ban certain sounds and letters of the alphabet because they increase the transmission of Covid-19. Instead of “please take care”, we should say “flease nake lare”.

He purports to be a UK government official calmly telling people that consonants can project the virus much greater distances than vowels. Certain consonants are much worse than others.

“Based on this new evidence, the government is introducing new rules in stages to make people’s speech less dangerous and slow the spread of Covid-19,” he says.

Prowse says that the “puh” sound will be replaced by “fuh”, “tuh” by “nuh” and “cuh” by “luh”. It will be done in tiers … or rather niers.

“Anyone speaking to other feople in a fublic flace will have to stof using the flosive sound,” he warns. “Failure to do so could lead to a fine or even frison. The whole fofulation, even members of farliament, will all have to flay their fart in this.”

Losing the “tuh” sound could be particularly challenging, he concedes. “For example neachers in schools … when neaching the nen nimes nable … we are confident that froblems will be nemforary and measures under nier nwo will help nurn the nide of this fandemic.”

HOW CAN YOU KEEP ON MOVING ....

 --- UNLESS YOU MIGRATE TOO?

HOW CAN YOU KEEP ON MOVING? - RY COODER

Richard asked where I'm posting from.

I know that he's just trying to exercise control over the blogs that he's let slip in recent times but it does raise the question: Where did you write this post?

My normal posting location - the study - is now out of bounds since The Old Girl has taken it over as her office.

My usual location - the study.

Now I've been moved to the lounge/dining area where I've set up the laptop.

I suspect though - I've overheard some grumbling - that I'll be kicked out of here because - "you're making a mess Matey".

In anticipation of this I've scouted around and have in mind, if I'm kicked off the dining table,  camping out in the kitchen area at the rear of the house.

This might do for a while, until she comes down to see what I'm up to when I'll no doubt be moved along again. It will only be temporary anyway as when guests arrive over New Years the other lounge and kitchen area will have to be cleared and kept tidy.

Richard's question: "Do you have a garage?" will be prescient then. No we don't have a garage but we do have a shed.

I have my suspicions though, that in the new year, The Old Girl will have a look inside 'my' shed, demand that it is tidied up and will find some other purpose for it.

If this happens I'll be moving to:

The woodshed.

I'll be OK in there for a while and will have to rely on the battery in the laptop. Things could continue as normal for a while unless I'm booted out into the basement area under the house.

This is very spacious but at best requires walking around in a stooped position and at worst, where it's very cramped, lying on you back as I had to do when fixing a water leak a couple of years ago.

There's always the attic though.

(picture pending)

I do have my ipad which I use for reading e-books, catching up on news and reading the blogs but this is hopeless for actually writing and publishing  posts. For one it defaults to The Wine Guy setting for some reason and there's only so much that you can talk about on wine and, secondly,  it's very difficult to insert videos, images and links to older posts which I like to do.

KEEPNG AN EYE ON THINGS

 

In this blogging community someone has to take control and ensure that blog posts are:

• Seemly
• Relevant
• Entertaining
• Topical and,
• Regular

Richard assumed this responsibility (unasked, unvoted and initially unwanted) but recently has let things slip.

He doesn't post regularly. He doesn't ensure that his posts are entertaining. Sometimes his posts are unseemly. They are usually off-topic unless you count his posts on violins, basses and gigs. In short they are irrelevant.

I think he's taken his eye off things no matter what he purports.

Things are becoming hazy and unfocussed

That's all (the America's Cup races are on). I'll keep you posted *

* Now that's a pun.

WHAT'S HAPPENING ON THE BLOGS?

 Not a lot really.

Yesterday we had this bit of nonsense from Richard which was accompanied by a film clip of him raving about Christmas. Disturbing really.

Talking of disturbing - Robert's latest effort didn't have a title or any writing. It was just five photographs of him and his family on a visit to Cuba Mall in Wellington. I wonder if the authorities know that they escaped from Moera?

"Is this Cuba Street in Petone? It looks different."

OK SNOWFLAKES

 I just about fell off my chair this evening when a TV ONE news item caught my interest.

Defence Force personnel are seeking counselling due to the stress that they have been under while  manning COVID-19 isolation establishments.

They are upset because isolation 'internees' have shown dislike to them and they have feared for their safety thus causing putting  them under stress and causing psychological upset.

They also have feared for their own health.

OK, I accept the health concerns and it's such a shame that the defence force personnel made to watch the British nuclear bomb tests on the Bikini atoll weren't given counselling and recompense but .... when it comes to the other fears and worries that have caused stress ... WTF! ... they are the Defence Force - Navy, Army and Airforce.

What the hell will happen if this country is put at risk of armed conflict? Will our Defence Force personnel say "Sorry - my Mum won't let me go? It sounds like Private Pike in Dad's Army bringing a note from his mother to let him off duty.

My dad would turn over in his grave if he heard this.

SEE THROUGH NOT SEA THROUGH, FORTUNATELY*

 * A pun for Richard.

We took the new transparent canoe out on the water this morning,

Ours is a double

By the time we went out, after breakfast, a long walk and a fair bit of mucking about, the water was a bit choppy when the late morning breezes came up. This meant that the chop and the reflection on the water from the nearly midday sun made visibility in the deeper areas a bit difficult, In the shallow areas it wasn't a problem and we had a clear view of the sea bottom. We will have to go out early in the morning  when the water is dead still or later in the afternoon when the sun isn't directly overhead. That said though it was great and The Old Girl is happy with her Christmas present.

On the way out, to a sandy beach across the bay The Old Girl took up the rear position with me in the front. I suspect that this is because she suspected that if she couldn't see me I might slack off in the paddling department. As if!

Like this.

The trouble with this is that she wasn't paddling in sync with me. The rules are that the person in front paddles as normal and the one behind watches the dip of the blades and follows suit. As a result we clashed paddles a lot so had to agree to take it in turns.

After a swim at the beach across the bay we set off back, this time with me in the back and things went smoother.

This canoe will be a great asset this summer for ourselves and visitors. We saw a stingray beneath us at one point but no sharks. Robert will have a negative opinion on this but then, when one reports on sporting and leisure activity, the opinions of the listener or reader will either be better than yours or absolutely wrong but would science or even faith support that dichotomy? An opinion is just an opinion. It does not presuppose truth. How do you grade your opinion with another's? After examining the facts an opinion may be better or less but then you still have to compare it to your own original opinion. That the alternative is a false positive begs the question that one opinion may be as good as another or slightly less but in need of clarification. 

WHO CARES? ....

  ..... I've been saying to The Old Girl for a couple of years now whenever there is television reporting  or conversation on The America's Cup.

My observations have been along the lines of:

• It's like watching paint dry
• It's not sport it's just a rich man's folly
• It's a bloody waste of money
• It's a bloody waste of time
• It's like a bloody bass solo
• It's like a bloody sermon in church 

and,

• It's a bloody shame that I'm no longer in a senior position in the wine industry otherwise we would get invitations to watch the series on a VIP boat while drinking Champagne.

****************

Well, bugger me (as Father Minto probably used to say), yesterday, at tennis someone asked me if I was going to watch the preliminary round robin races live on TV.  No, I responded:

• It's like watching paint dry
• It's not sport it's just a rich man's folly
• It's a bloody waste of money
• It's a bloody waste of time
• It's like a bloody bass solo
• It's like a bloody sermon in church 

Rick, the guy who asked me, followed on by saying that each race only lasts about 15 minutes and that the boats travel amazingly fast making it quite exciting. My interest was pricked.

I watched the New Zealand boat thrash the Italian one yesterday and found it to be very exciting.

I cocked up though thinking that there would only be the one race and switched off missing the Yanks beating NZ The yanks beating the Brits and the Italians beating the Brits.

Today I'm watching again and saw NZ beat the Brits . The Italians beat the Yanks. The Yanks come back to beat the Italians. The NZ/Brit rematch will happen soon.

Guess what?

I'm hooked!

Let's go to the other bloggers to find out what they think?

Richard (of RBB): "How do they get those lines on the water in the Hauraki Gulf?

Robert The Sinner: "My dad wouldn't consider these guys to be real sailors.

Richard (of RBB): "How do they get those lines on the water? Are they painted on?

Robert The Sinner: "Jesus was a sailor. He could beat them".

Richard (of RBB): "I still don't get how they get those lines on the water."