WADDA YA GONNA DO?

 

I've been binge-watching the outstanding Sopranos on NEON and admire the clever device of using Dr Melfi the psychiatrist as the conduit to the viewer understanding Tony Soprano and the shaper of his thoughts and unfortunately his actions.

It occurred to me that The Curmudgeons Inc.ⓒ could do with having a PSYCHOANALYST CURMUDGEON in the group to help sort out the abreactions and affect-allusions of the other bloggers in this community.

To test this we've decided to have a trial run and, in the absence of a PSYCHOANALYST CURMUDGEON, The Curmudgeon's Agony Aunt has stepped in to run the pilot. We selected a leading blogger who has shown signs of alogia recently and who might benefit from a little 'tune-up'.

**************************

THE CURMUDGEON'S AGONY AUNT: Mmm - hello Richard. How are we today mmm?

RICHARD OF RICHARD'S BASS BAG: Well you can cut that psychological mumbo jumbo out for a start if you want to get any proper responses from me you ...

THE CURMUDGEON'S AGONY AUNT: ..... aggression, delusion, feelings of superiority - this will be good ...

RICHARD OF RICHARD'S BASS BAG: ... silly old cunt. Ha ha, that reminds me - a while ago I gave you a funny nickname - 'Sallyoldcunt' ha ha.

THE CURMUDGEON'S AGONY AUNT: Yes. I remember. Donald Trump  has a habit of thinking up 'clever' nicknames for people too.

RICHARD OF RICHARD'S BASS BAG: Yeah. Ha ha ....hey!

THE CURMUDGEON'S AGONY AUNT: Let's move on Richard. We've noticed recently that your posting is lacking in substance. Not in volume though as your verbiage vocabulary has been sustained but there's a poverty of speech and thought that's giving concern.

RICHARD OF RICHARD'S BASS BAG: What the fuck? I ...

THE CURMUDGEON'S AGONY AUNT:. ... Yes, your speech, though adequate in verbiage, conveys very little information and may consist of stock phrases or vague references. In poverty of thought, by contrast, there is a far-reaching impoverishment of your  entire thinking which, as a result, says very little. 

RICHARD OF RICHARD'S BASS BAG: Hey! I get more comments on my posts than those other bloggers put together ...

THE CURMUDGEON'S AGONY AUNT: ... Boogers?

RICHARD OF RICHARD'S BASS BAG: Huh?

THE CURMUDGEON'S AGONY AUNT: You said 'boogers'. What's a booger?

RICHARD OF RICHARD'S BASS BAG: I said 'blogger'. I'm a blogger. Shoosh!

THE CURMUDGEON'S AGONY AUNT: Ahh. I see ...mmm. But you write most of those comments yourself don't you? In keeping with our alogia diagnosis this can indicate a negative symptom of schizophrenia although it may also be seen in advanced dementia.

RICHARD OF RICHARD'S BASS BAG: Shoosh! (again) I didn't come here to be insulted. Come on Angry Jesus, Bunny, Akish, Bin, Phillip, James, Terry ...we're leaving.

THE CURMUDGEON'S AGONY AUNT: with a satisfied smile  Thanks for coming. Maybe we can meet up again soon.

Richard departs seemingly talking to himself and holding the outer door open to ... well,  no-one.