Sunday 22 September 2019

LET'S TALK RUGBY




It's been a great couple of days and the Rugby Word Cup in Japan is shaping up to be a cracker.
The games so far have all been thrillers especially the All Black's opening match in Pool B against South Africa. This could have gone either way but fortunately it went our way - a win to New Zealand. Thanks guys.

It's late and the game has just finished but THE CURMUDGEON INC.ⓒ quickly cobbled together some commentators on a conference line to discuss this historic event.
We have with us The Curmudgeon, Robert aka Second Fiddle and Richard 'Tighthead' Prowse from Richard's Bass Bag and live from Japan, Steve Hansen.

Let's go to it.

THE CURMUDEON: Welcome guys. Thanks for calling in.

RICHARD 'TIGHTHEAD' PROWSE: No probs TC, glad to help.

ROBERT 'SECOND FIDDLE': Whatever.

STEVE HANSEN" Mrrrmmmmmph!

THE CURMUDEON: Um, OK. Let's start with you Robert. What's your take on the game tonight?

ROBERT 'SECOND FIDDLE':I think this rugby thing is silly. Grown men running around after a ball is nuts. I find it hard nowadays getting help in the cleaning business as the Polynesians would rather do less work and kick a ball around for more pay. I think ......

THE CURMUDGEON: .....OK....let's leave that there shall we. Richard, before I ask you the question that Robert didn't answer, what's the background to that interesting nickname you have - 'Tighthead'?

RICHARD 'TIGHTHEAD' PROWSE: Ha ha TC - glad you asked. A tighthead prop is one of the three players at the front of the scrum. They stand on the right-hand side of the hooker. As they take most of the impact in the scrum, a prop should have plenty of strength in their upper body. This is the area of the body where all the power is created for the big push....

THE CURMUDEON: Right I think we've got tha ........

RICHARD 'TIGHTHEAD' PROWSE: .... A scrum is all about getting low. A tighthead prop is the cornerstone of a scrum, that is all of the angles of force come through him. A loosehead is tasked with trying to isolate and get under a tighthead prop, with the intention of trying to drive him up, while a tighthead tries to either pin him down using his greater weight. In essence, in each scrum there are two battles of supremacy between a loosehead and a tighthead.

THE CURMUDEON: Right I think we've got tha ........

RICHARD 'TIGHTHEAD' PROWSE: The props "prop up" the hooker in the scrum. They form part of the front row of the scrum and push against the opposition's props. The loosehead prop is positioned to the left of the hooker and his head will be on the outside of the scrum when it engages. The tighthead is to the right of the hooker with his head positioned between the opposition hooker and the opposition loosehead prop. The prop's main role is to provide stability at the scrum and support the hooker in quickly winning the ball. In boring is when ....

THE CURMUDEON: (sotte voce) That's for damn sure ...

RICHARD 'TIGHTHEAD' PROWSE: What's that? what? Hey did I ever tell you about when I was at college and one year I took the most ti .....

THE CURMUDEON: Well, thanks Richard we'd better move on as Steve is waiting on the line from Japan. Hi Steve. What's your opinion of the first few games especially The All Blacks?

STEVE HANSEN: Mummmbbblemmmbrr uffoggmm. Brmmbbbbhhhmmmzzzmmmmbbbbbrrrrr!

THE CURMUDEON: Right, it's late guys we'd better wrap this up., er, thanks for calling in (I think).


3 comments:

Robert Sees Things in Sky said...

Robert smiles.

Richard (of RBB) said...

"What's that? what? Hey did I ever tell you about when I was at college and one year I took the most ti ...."
Just for accuracy, I played hooker - not tight head prop. Big difference. One game I took 16 tightheads. I was lucky to have a strong forward pack and two very good props. The Curmudgeon Inc is sending out false news or, at best, approximated news.
These days I spend my time experimenting with different bass strings. Why don't you ask me about that?

THE WINE GUY said...

I don't think you need to be asked about that.