**SPECIAL REPORT**

⛑ COVIT-19 ⛑has been getting everyone excited so THE CURMUDGEONS INCⓒ has decided to try and allay readers' fears.

It appears that Robert The Inveterate Sinner has the religious side covered. See here from a recent post by The Curmudgeon (me 😏): HERE

The Curmudgeon has written an important post on hygiene.

We at THE CURMUDGEONS INCⓒ have observed that, outside of China and Iran the most serious cases of COVID-19 with associated deaths have been in Italy!

You might have noticed that in THE CURMUDGEONS INCⓒ we do not have an Italian correspondent. Mea Culpa (fortunately we do have ex-students from St Patricks College who studied latin and one Altar Boy who went on to be a sacristan) but this situation may be rectified in the future. 

["'Rectified' - I love the pun there, The Curmudgeon. We taught you well"]

- Father Minto - Rector of St. Patrick's College 1964 - 1972).

Er, thanks Father Minto. Moving on though we've decided to call in an expert in all things Italian to help explain this geo-political and pandemic crisis.
We contacted Romero Breslin who we knew as a great restauranteur and  former owner of Il Casino in Tory Street Wellington. We were confident that Romero would know.

THE CURMUDGEONS INCⓒ . ☎ Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring

Mmmm. No answer. Never mind, we'll contact Richard of RBB. He's an Italophile so should know someone who can help.

THE CURMUDGEONS INCⓒ ☎ Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring

RICHARD (OF RBB) Pronto.

THE CURMUDGEONS INCⓒ Well that didn't sound very pronto to me matey! It took 12 rings for you to answer.

RICHARD (OF RBB) Chi è là?

THE CURMUDGEONS INCⓒ It's me, The Curmudgeon. I want to ask you ......

RICHARD (OF RBB) Ah! Il blogger esperto. Come stai?

THE CURMUDGEONS INCⓒ Yeah, never mind all that palaver, I want to know the name of an Italian expert that we can talk to.

RICHARD (OF RBB) Hey. Puoi parlarmi con mia piccola coniglietta.

THE CURMUDGEONS INCⓒ What ...... oh never mind. Look, we at THE CURMUDGEONS INCⓒ
want to know why there are so many Covid-19 cases in Italy . We .....

RICHARD (OF RBB) Sì sì sì Il dio di Robert sta causando questo perché vuole che io vada all'inferno perché ho preso in giro la sua religione lui ....

THE CURMUDGEONS INCⓒ What?  Look, I don't know what you said but it sounded a bit of a rant. We want to know why the current coronavirus is devastating Italy.

RICHARD (OF RBB) Ah sì, il papa ha detto che tutto aveva a che fare con Pio nazista - simpatizzante e il fatto che Robert si stesse rifiutando di riconoscere i misfatti passati del Catholic Church. Dice anche .

THE CURMUDGEONS INCⓒ Look, thanks anyway. We'll see if we can find an Iranian person or someone who knows something about Iran. Goodbye.

RICHARD (OF RBB)  Si, si, addio.