K?

 I've written about this before which, of course gives me the opportunity to link to an earlier post*

HERE

AND HERE

Today I declared that I was off to town to buy a few essentials:

• A bicycle pump
• A HDMI to USB connector
• Some microwave cooking dishes

As I was leaving, The Old Girl said she wanted me to go to Briscoe's to buy a mattress protector.

My heart sank. I hate having to buy these things that women are better at buying.

"Can you check on the Briscoe's website and establish exactly what you want?" I said.

"OK" she said, dangerously compliant.

I puttered about waiting, and waiting and waiting .... and eventually interrupted her from what she was doing on her computer.

"I wrote it down for you. It's on the kitchen bench." she said.

I looked and there was a note next to my wallet, phone and car keys. I hadn't seen her doing this as, during my puttering I went to the toilet before my long drive into town.

The note said:

"Hilton So Soft Mattress Protector - should be around $85." 

"Bugger!" I thought. "Not enough information. I need a product number to make sure that I buy the right thing."

I went to the study to ask her clarify bother her but she was on a conference call.

"Bugger!" I thought.

I headed off into town on my quest.

It might as well have been in search of the Holy Grail.

I went to The Warehouse first as I had checked on-line in their website which stated that they stocked the computer connection I needed.

It was out of stock.

"Bugger!" I thought.

I went to the sports and toys section where I had once purchased a bicycle pump.

They were all out of stock.

"Bugger!" I thought.

I left The Warehouse and went to Rebel Sports. After finding the cycling section, before I wasted time looking I asked an assistant to show me where the bicycle pumps were.

"We don't stock those" she said. "We have helmets, padded pants, clips, gloves and 897 other essential cycling items" she said.

"No pumps?" I asked

"No pumps". she said.

"Bugger!" I thought.

I drove to the bike shop where, about a year ago I had new tyres fitted to my bike.

It was closed. Totally closed as in shut down.

"Bugger!" I thought, thinking that soon a 'Sheesh!' would be necessary.

I then went to Noel Leeming in search for a computer connection. This time, as soon as I entered the shop I did what I seldom do - I asked an assistant for, well, assistance. The young woman listened to what I wanted and then led me on a search around the store (no-one setting up this retail operation thought it a good idea to keep all of the computer connections together in the one place). After looking at the offerings from four different locations she said:

"We don't stock that".

"Not for the HDMI to USB" I queried.

"No, we can do HDMI to USB-2, or HDMI to USB-2, or, HDMI to fucking old Uncle Cobley and all."

"Oh" I answered, knowing that, in my head I'd invented that 'Uncle Tom Cobley thing. "So, no luck" I asked.

"No luck" she said "but, why don't you try Jaycar."

I tried Jaycar next. The helpful guy listened to my request and said:

 "We've got what you want but you won't like the price."

"OK, how much?" I asked.

"$129.00". he said and showed me  little bit of plastic and metal.

"We used to have some cheaper ones that, by using two different connectors you could get the same result but .." he said.

"You're out of stock." I answered.

"Bugger!" I thought, and headed off to  Briscoe's to hopefully buy a Hilton So Soft Mattress Protector.

I found the bedding section and, with surprising ease found the mattress protector shelves. There were a lot of Hilton products. I searched and found Hilton So Soft Mattress Protectors.

There were sizes:

• Single
• King Single
• Ultra King.

"Bugger!" I thought and took a photo of the King Single one and sent to The Old Girl with a message to call me urgently. She replied in a couple of minutes.

"What? " she asked.

"That mattress protector you want, is the 'King Single' the one?"

"No" she answered we want 'King'.

"There are no 'Kings'" I said "there's a 'King Singles'. 'Single'. or 'King Ultra'."

"Get a King" she said.

"There are no .... look, I hate doing this, I knew ....."  I started to say.

"I'll sort it" she said "I'll order it on line."

OK. Here am I in the bloody shop and she decides now, to order on-line. I hate doing this type of shopping. I'm not a misogynist. I'm not a chauvinist  but there are some things that men and women cannot agree on. Shopping for clothes, bedding, underwear, toiletries and cosmetics are definitely among them. I left the store.

On the way home I decided to call into an Op shop to see if they had a bicycle pump. They didn't but - the woman at the counter, when I asked said that maybe K-Mart would have them. Off I went to K-Mart. They stocked bicycle pumps and I chose a rather sophisticated pump - certainly grander than the ones I'm used to. "Bugger it!" I thought "I don't care what it costs. It cost $6! I could hardly believe it.

I checked out the computer accessories section - just in case. They stocked the connector I'd been on the hunt for over the last couple of hours. It cost $16!

K Mart, I'm sold.

* The Curmudgeons Inc.ⓒ takes pride in being able to provide links to previous posts back to 2007 whereas other bloggers in this community, through deleting blogs and posts do not have this vast and important repository to refer to.